#THIS WAS VERY VERY RUSHED AND I WANTED TO INCLUDE MORE DIALOGUE AND SCENES BUT

[nerdylilpeebee]

The more I think of episode 8, the more it kinda annoys me.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the episode, but fuck man, does this finale REEK of one of two things: either the show was cancelled, or the writer couldn't think of any way to satisfyingly tie up all the plot threads they set up. Hence why nearly each one got a very quick, very brief "here you go" before moving on the main shit.

Nori and Khan's reunion? Quick, albeit cute scene where Nori acts bashful and Khan thinks she's hot but doesn't quite know who she is.

V's return? Oh look, V's back and here's some fanservice as she's on a raptor like so many of you did in fanarts. Not gonna address how she survived, or how she got this thing to do what she wanted it to, just here you go, she's, back. Anyway, time for fight scenes.

J's reaction to Tessa being dead, something it was subtly implied she didn't know back in episode 6 when she acted confused as to why Tessa wanted her to stay behind? Not even gonna include this, she just implies she's scared and wants to be on the winning side. We'll even toss in her saying she never needed V and N just so you don't notice we've given this character basically no character development and she exists just as a final barrier before Cyn. Please ignore she attempted to kill N with absolutely no hesitation the second set got the excuse to, making it make absolutely zero fucking sense she cared about either of her teammates.

Doll? You get a quick image of her corpse just before the credits. Please ignore the glaring plothole that SHOULD have meant she survived her wounds, since ya know... Uzi does the exact same with a worse wound, coming back from a fatal error simply cuz her core was placed back on her chest cavity... Which was the case for Doll the ENTIRE time she was injured, as it never left her body. (This is the most egregious one to me. No dialogue or nothing, not even a scene of Lizzy, her best friend, looking sad at her death. This was a MAJOR CHARACTER, and all we get to tie up her story is a flash of her corpse to tell us "yep, she's dead folks.")

Ooo, how about how Uzi is gonna resist the solver? You get a quick scene at the start that implies the necklace her mom gave her somehow gives her resistance... Please ignore this has never been implied at any point before in the story and the solver was VISIBLY shown taking over her body while she still had the fucking necklace on in the previous fucking episode.

They even kinda hand wave Nuzi, and don't even give us the long-awaited kiss. I'm not saying it was 100% necessary, but fuck man could it have helped the episode a lot of we at least got that.

... I enjoyed the episode. I did. There were lots of cute moments, the fight scenes were cool, and I loved Cyn...

But by the fucking GODS did this seem like they were just trying to end it with no regard for the story they'd set up. I am 100% in the camp of "Murder Drones was cancelled, they just don't want the backlash that comes with cancelling a well-loved show." The rushed nature of this finale and the fact it was advertised as the "season finale" up until I think episode 7 makes it glaringly obvious they intended to let these plot points breathe. To do SOMETHING that wasn't a rush-job.

Again, for the third time, I enjoyed the episode. I do love what we got. but I will forever mourn what we could have had. If it even just got room to breathe, longer than 20 fucking minutes, it could have been satisfying. It could have tied up these plot points just fine. But it didn't.

Such wasted potential.

[sticks-stones-sonic-insanity]

I JUST FINISHED SONK ADVENTURE 2 IM NOT OKAY OMG

The scene with Shadow falling to earth was funny at first and it all happened so fast i was still trying to wrap my head around it. Ppl talk about that scene a lot which theyre so right for, but i need to talk about the scenes after because oh my god they broke me!?!??!

Sonic, coming back onto the ark, completely silent. Everyone asking if Shadow made it back and he just slowly shakes his head without a word.

The scene where Sonic gives Rouge Shadow's inhibitior ring hold so much more weight to me after actually playing the game: In the short time they knew each other, Shadow saved Rouge's life. Twice. This is the only possession she has to remember him by. Knuckles asks her what shes going to do now and she actually stops to reflect and remarks how shes thinking of changing jobs, something else on her mind now(What exactly shes referring to in this moment isnt stated but theres a fair few connections to draw there). After almost getting killed during a heist and never getting a chance to thank the guy who saved her from it, that's a pretty good and strangely mature call to make from a writing standpoint. This whole scene has a similar feeling like that, like the jokes and the extravagance thats typical of the cutscenes have really been toned down with intention.

This one genuinely shocked me, and im really surprised i havent come across anything about it yet because the scene between Eggman and Tails was actually super deep?? There are a lot of different Sonic medias as far as I im aware that have touched on the paralells between Eggman and Tails: their small similarities and how well they work together when they have to, but the scene here really stuck out to me. Eggman is talking about how much he admired his grandfather as a child, how much his work inspired him to learn and create and strive to be great like him, drifting off to question whether or not he really wanted to see them all fall. Tail's response is very chipper and optimistic, but i really like the idea of Eggman having almost this turning point here, having to face something so saddening as watching someone you love curse the world and everyone on it(including you). After arguably some of the most dangerous and threatening feats have been accomplished by Eggman in this game as the story's primary antagonist, is this moment a nod to him maybe stopping to think about what he's done? Im amazed by how much meaning can be taken from these few seconds of dialogue!!

Finally, the last two moments. Amy, despite having had her own short heart to heart with Shadow before the final battle and ultimately being the one to spurr Shadow on to fight alongside Sonic and the others, doesn't seem as upset by Shadows death as Sonic is. This is genuinely, in my limited knowledge of Sonic media, one of the only instances i have seen Sonic be thoroughly shaken up by something and brushed it off when someone asks him whats wrong. In most cases, he's just relatively unfazed from an emotional standpoint like that, so theres nothing to brush off in the first place. But here, the ever-yapping blue blur remains silent for a while, just staring at Earth in a similar paralell to how Shadow used to. It isn't until Amy comes by that he looks away. Its the really subtle details here that get me: Sonic doesn't look or respond to her right away. There's a prominent pause of silence before he turns to her and says its nothing, switching the topic immediately to rush her along. Sonic, typically impatient and eager to move to the next adventure, slows down and is the last to leave the deck, delivers the farewell line to end the game. Again, the contrast in how slowly and soft he speaks here in comparison to literally anything else he says in the game is insane. The pause between "Shadow" and "the Hedgehog" is still very funny to me and im not lost on how the delivery does end up being chopped up quite goofy like that, but if that isnt an absolutely insane way to end off the game with such a somber, emotional moment...

Sonadow or no sonadow, take it as you will, its undeniable how impactful this adventure in particular is to Sonic. How much Shadow meant to him by the end of the game. How much his sacrifice meant. I really see his discussion with Rouge as both a way to comfort her, and to comfort himself. To say out loud how heroic and brave he'd seen Shadow to be, regardless of the intention that came from his creation. Sonic is big on freedom and giving people the opportunity to live how they want to, and Shadow's sacrifice in that regard means even more to him. He had just come to understand what he had truly promised Maria he'd do, joined Sonic whole-heartedly to help save the planet, and never got to experience anything beyond that. Given Eggmans continuous antangonistic streak at that point (I'm not fully aware of the other villain's Sonic had faced up until that point), it's rare that Sonic actually gets to see someone who opposed him change for the better!! And not only was Shadow one of the first to do so, but he was a speedy teen hedgehog!!! Just like Sonic himself!!! Its like Shadow said, there was so much more to them that they never got to find out about each other!! The fact that Shadow gave up all of that possibility, all of his own personal freedom to help Sonic save the planet and the freedom of all the people on it? That hits. HARD.

Im not familiar with the full canon of how Sonic actually managed to get one of Shadow's inhibitior rings to give to Rouge, as he's actually not shown in any scene taking them off during the final battle(i actually dont even think their mechanics are properly explained which is more confusing but yk), but getting into more headcanony, sonadow adjacent space for a second? I like to think Shadow actually took two of his rings off/had two break off before he fell. Sonic gave one to Rouge, and secretly kept the other for himself. He obviously didn't want his friends to ask him more questions about how he was feeling, so he hid it in his quills before he greeted them back on the ark. Shadow ended up meaning a lot to Sonic, and it's really interesting to think about what was running through Sonic's mind when all was said and done.

Uhhh anyways good game very very infuriating at times but very good game i have a true taste for the appeal of Sonic games now and i want to play them all. If you actually made it this far, thank you for reading my silly sonk rant! If you have any information you know of to patch the spaces where I'm lacking or just want to discuss your own thoughts on the ending feel free!! Have a good day or night wherever you are :]

[eewtp]

Not a PJO Show Review*

Now I was so excited for a truthful adaptation of the books and I am left just disappointed with every new episode that comes out. First of all, why was this fourth episode not even 30 minutes long? ?

Anyway, one of my main issues so far includes pacing of the story. It’s very much stuck in a “rushed but at the same time slow” moving kind of pace, which is insanely weird. In one episode they spend all their time in one place but the writing tries to cram so much detail into that episode that everything rushes by with dialogue instead of action. It’s so weird I can’t even describe it well, but the point is that there is entirely too much of the characters walking you across the street with dialogue only readers could actually follow/understand.

(For example; Zeus is pissed that the bolt is missing and wants it back by the summer solstice or else he’ll start a war. The solstice is in a few days. This is mentioned once/twice and nobody has shown even an ounce of urgency to find the bolt. It’s just expected of you to remember that fact while the show does nothing to remind you of it- the sun is always out and it’s not stormy to show just how mad Zeus is, the characters calmly walk and chat and never once mention the bolt again, etc.)

The exposition dumping does not help at all; a sentence or two to describe something important only for the talking to drag on with the expectation that you know what they’re talking about. Grover absolutely running through what CHB is all about, the entire point of the kids’ quest, Annabeth being the daughter of wisdom (so far there has not been one instance where this is proven, just mentioned offhandedly). There’s hardly any personality attached to any one character because all they do is rapidly explain things.

Now, exactly why are they going to the Underworld? To save Sally, yes; but what does that have to do with the bolt? At this point their mission is Sally, not the quest- the Hellhound chase scene was cut from the show, so now there is no indication at all that Hades might have had something to do with the missing bolt. Poseidon and Zeus are pointing fingers at each other (which was either not mention or I missed it because of how off handed this detail was), so why in the world would Hades play a part in this? Because these three hate each other? Again, only readers would be inclined to think like this because their hatred was never emphasized or expanded upon.

(Are they hoping to just ask and receive some kind of news about the bolt? They have no lead as to where the bolt may be, so going to Sally’s aid first and then figuring out details with the bolt is so questionable. Again, this is far from showing the urgency of the situation)

Also, Luke’s betrayal is going to be interesting. He’s the one who let the Hellhound in, which put the entirety of camp in danger for his own goals. Without this, he’s just some guy who doesn’t agree with the situation they’re currently in- he’s not dangerous or evil, so far he’s just there.

Friendships are just not there. They say Luke and Annabeth are like family but they’ve spoken once. They say Luke and Percy are tentative friends but all they did was have a tour around camp. They say Percy and Grover are best friends but their conversations mainly revolve around dumping exposition.

There’s more I have to say but I’ll just say I have hope the show will make up for this iffy start. It’s not too much, but it’s there-ish.

[biribaa]

Victor sfw alphabet yaya

i loove victor. he deserves way more fanfictions

TW/CW: FNV spoilers

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Victor can be as affective as your heart desires him to be. Being a cowboy also includes being a gentleman, and he wants to show he's the right man for you. Victor is more used to show his love by words of affection and being protective, as these are the easiest options for him and also the ones he claims to be professional with. The securitron do wishes he could show more phisical affection, but he's afraid with a body as bulky and hard as his, it wont do much besides somes hugs, so its better for you to show all the phisical attention.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Your friendship with Victor would start right after you enter the Strip, that if you have some time left for some talk and even some rounds of blackjack, in which he's very skilled at. And you both would have even more free time after House win the hoover dam battle.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Because of his model, Victor is afraid you are going to feel uncomfortable during cuddling, but if you're willing to, sure, he would feel flattered. In moment, Victor would attempt wrapping one of his arms around your waist, bringing you closer to him.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

The idea of having a calm and sweet domestic life with you is comforting for the robot, and he will make the effort to bring this feeling to you at the Lucky 38. As a cowboy, Victor does knows a few culinary tricks, but nothing out of the ordinary or extraordinary, its the basic of the basics in gastronomy.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Victor would wait for the right time for both of you and then tell you everything. He would be direct, but also trying to not keep the scene harsh, constantly reassuring you that you two can continue to be friends.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Victor never thought that much about weddings, or that he would ever marry someone, so he doesnt have a much strong opinion about it. Victor won't rush you, of course, but if you did propose for him in the right time of your relationship, he would accept right away!

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Victor is extra gentle with you due to his securitron model, every movement with you are made with extra delicacy for you and only you to prevent any discomfort or injuries. His claws always caressing your shoulder in a flimsy, yet firm movement.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

He loves hugs! Victor deeply love any any type of phisical affection coming from you. He just struggles when its him perfoming them. But trust me, he loooves them.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Victor is far more used with perform his acts of affection to you(protection and being verbal) as a way to say his "I love you" to you, and hes not accustomed with PDA. So hes more comfortable with using the phrase when hes alone with you, or when youre talking with only him.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Victor only gets clearly stressy when someone is obviously hitting on you, in that case, the cowboy grinds his teeth and makes subtle movements that imply the relationship between you two. He adds one of his arm around your waist, uses more romantic nicknames than usual, and repeatedly mentions the fact both of you are dating during dialogues, this while a blatant gaze is pointed at the person in question.

Victor trusts you, so when you are the person causing all this jealousy with someone else, he takes it way less seriously. He does feels the sentiment deep down, but he rather joke about it, as I mentioned, he trusts you. Unless its actually getting very suspect, then he will push you to a talk.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

He LOVES to be kissed by you in his screen. You press your lips against Victor's screen and you experience the same staticky feeling everytime while his strong arms push you closer. He absolutly loves to (attempt) kiss your face and any part of it, and the same goes for him. If not your face, then perhaps, if he could, your neck.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Some kids are afraid of Victor, the others really enjoy him! Its just the cheerful cowboy personality that attracts the children. Victor doesn't mind, he likes to show them tricks and teach them small things while also being a jokester to them. With that being said, hes pretty good with children!

He never really thought about the idea of him being a father, tho, it gives him a good feeling, but he would definetly question you if you really want to have a family with him, a securitron, or if even House would allow it. In the end, if everything goes okay with House and you fully convince him that you really wants him to be the father, he would feel more than flattered... For a good while Victor will be all soft towards you and call you all the names that one can imagine.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Victor always arrives in the right time if he's not busy with some work coming from House. He bids you a "g'mornin'", and waits for you to get ready for the day, or rushes you, if you have any appointment for the day. Sometimes, if hes feeling extra, he even brings breakfast for you.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

If you do want to sleep with Victor right next to you, laying by your side in your bed, that would be...difficult. So mostly, when sleeping in the Lucky 38, Victor prefers to stay by the side of your bed, still counts as company and he is right next to you!! If you prefer, he even offers his arm for you to hold.

In other times, where both of you arent in the Lucky, and rather out in the wasteland, when you sleep in the ground, it would be far more easy for Victor to lay in the ground with you! But he still prefers to stay up, getting up from the ground is difficult for a securitron, and he wants to keep you safe while both are out.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Theres not much Victor have to hidden, due to his amnesia(more likely caused by House). So you pretty much know everything about him already, and he would love to expand his historic with you.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Victor is a happy folk, but that could easily change with any threat towards you or him.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Victor is a securitron, so excluding his amnesia about himself, he can remember several things about you! Birthday, favorite food, favorite book, weapon, flowers, little details of your backstory, pretty much anything!

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Victor adores the moments where both of you are out in the wastelands, alone, while youre laying next to him in the middle of the night. Its peaceful, no gunshots or anything of that except for the radio. A small moment Victor finds himself craving more.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Can be very protective to any threat towards you or any ally and isnt afraid of making a mess, unless demanded to not.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Victor got quickly used to perform everyday tasks for you sake, he even finds himself enjoying it, nothing more than his responsability. But when it comes to special dates, he adds some extra effort(with some help with Jane, too). Dates arent going to be perfect, of course, but he makes sure to make it charming for both of you, he cooks and prepare everything at Lucky 38 for you and you only.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

As I said, protective, sometimes a little too much. Without any warning Victor could be already poiting one of his weapons to anyone slightly suspicious or threatening to you. Hes already naturally protective, when hes with you it gets extra.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Theres not much Victor worry about, hes a securitron. And deep down, he enjoys the dust and scratches in his metal, makes him feel truly like a dusty cowboy.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Victor wont feel like a disaster, nor he ever felt before dating you, but will certainly miss you. You just made things more exciting and bright, yknow? But in the end, he agrees if youre happy somewhere else, or with someone else, hes happy too.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Victor is always using a cowboy hat over his antenna, it spins like crazy, yeah, but makes him feel different and more original than the others securitrons. I also hc him as bisexual

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Debauched people or/and pure cowards, it bugs the securitron a lot, and makes him wonder if he can trust someone like you. Victor enjoys actions some time or other and having a honest partner. Not choosing violent is something, running away from it is another.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He can't sleep! The most Victor can do is shut down.

[beevean]

I think I can finally pinpoint what bothers me so much about the Lenector ship - not even how it was treated in the show, but the very idea of making it "nuanced".

Long story short, I found an author that promised to flesh out the Lenector storyline in the show, including getting a better insight into Lenore's thought process and rewriting some of the dialogue (I appreciated that they fixed the "interrogation" in S3 to make Hector specify that he never cared about a reward, it made him look less stupid)

Author never rewrote the rape scene, which disappointed me but oh well, but they did write Hector and Lenore finally talking about the ring, a discussion sorely missing in S4. It was more or less what I would have written: Lenore swearing that she had no choice and it was for his own good and protection, and Hector lamenting that she still tricked him and made him into a pet and she could have been honest because he would have agreed to work with them.

... but he's still in love with her. He kisses her gladly. And his "conflict", his anger at the betrayal, is framed as something in the way of his love, an obstacle that he'd have to get over it.

And there it is.

Even with the acknowledgement that what Lenore did was horrible, there is the assumption that Hector, after a good talk, is bound to forgive her. That it still makes sense that he'd be attracted to her. That it's okay, because she meant well. That it's okay, because she didn't technically lie, only twisted the truth to wear down his mental defenses (already worn down by imprisonment and abuse)! Oh, I guess I must have dreamed Lenore saying that she wanted to run away with him before kissing him :) to be fair, it was a terrible piece of writing. Good thing it wasn't real, apparently!

Yes, Hector's forgiveness should have taken time, but it should have happened. Because Lenore is not a bad person and they deserved to be together. Because what she did, which was deliberately push her prisoner in a delicate mental state into having sex with her so that she'd put an enslaving ring without his consent, was just an honest mistake and doesn't speak at all of her morality.

She's the best he got. She's nice to him, because she makes cute dick jokes and goes to whine to him. She's better than Dracula, who lied to him (Lenore never did), and better than Carmilla, who was violent with him (Lenore never was). This is not to be taken as a sign of how horribly this man has been treated in life, and how he'd be happy with the smallest of crumbs because he has been broken that badly. Lenore is the happiness he deserves. Ignore how "your life could be worse" is literal textbook abuser logic, it's true in his case.

The problem with S4 is not that it excused Lenore's rape by deception. It's that it rushed the forgiveness that was due and didn't allow them to be together. Lenore's suicide was Ellis hating this character that completely overtook Carmilla's already established role and was treated far more magnanimously than the similar Japanese not-twins, clearly!

And this is the impasse I cannot get over. Every time, every damn time, even when fans agree that S4 was a disaster, all arguments funnel to this one part: Lenore raping Hector for her plans is not a moral event horizon. Hector loving her makes perfect sense and it is a tragic, "nuanced" romance that should have ended with the two kissing in the sunset, finally having in their arms someone who truly respects them.

^ the face of someone who only wanted to protect and take care of the prisoner whom she tricked into sex. She should have been happy with him forever and ever, really 🥺

I'm not judging the shippers' morality, obviously, I don't know any of these people. But the arguments they use make me sick to my stomach, which is made even worse by the fact that the show itself pushes this narrative, just in a way that was so shitty that even the fans were like "bruh".

I won't bother rewriting this trash, because I can do better with the gameverse. But if I ever did, I'd only ask for Hector to at least be conflicted until her sunning (which is not as nonsensical as fans seem to think lol, it just needs to be worded better). Like he recognizes that she did improve his life, but she used unforgivable means for no good reason. You want a tragic romance between two kindred souls? Remove that despicable, cruel act. The Lenore of S3 and the Lenore of S4 are irreconcilable and trying to do so always degenerates in rape apologism whether you mean it or not.

[archduchessgortash]

PSA for Durge-players:

Durge has an exclusive cutscene that plays at the very first long rest at camp.

It isn't especially big or crucial, but I hate missing story content, and this scene is VERY easily missed. In it, the Dark Urge reflects on what they think is going on inside their head, pondering whether it feels related to their class or species, etc. The scene also establishes the context by which we can infer that Astarion, if recruited, may have first noticed Durge's peculiar behavior even in a playthrough in which no major Durge-specific events have yet occurred. There's also an opportunity for Durge to select options indicative of embracing or resisting the Urge. They can also express curiosity about their past.

In order to unlock the scene, Durge must remain essentially clueless about most of their past for the first day. How to below the cut...

Because of the false sense of urgency that being infested with a mind flayer parasite creates, it is tempting to rush to find a healer or the crèche. Many events and choices to which we have access on the first day will skip this scene permanently if you do them prior to completing your first long rest.

If you want the cutscene, DON'T do these things until after your first long rest:

Do not gain ANY Durge-related inspiration points available in the initial areas, including...

If you stomp the injured mind flayer in the wreckage near Astarion's recruitment spot, you won't get the scene. Don't worry about the inspiration point. The illithid will still be there after a rest as long as you don't trigger the scene at the gates to the Emerald Grove before you return to it. The mind flayer relocates to the Goblin Camp if you go to the grove without interacting with it. (You can notice it in the wreckage, go to camp standing right in front of it, take a long rest, and it will still be there in the morning.)

Failure to recruit Gale because you only have a piece of him... in your pack. Oopsie-daisy, poor rizzard... 😬

Choosing Durge-related resist dialogue to free Gale from the arcane sigil rather than using one of the class-specific options, if available.

Meeting Withers

Furthermore, simply entering the Dank Crypt level from any of the 3 possible entrances, even if you haven't met Withers and do nothing at all inside, will lock out the scene. More below on what you can do after we finish the no-no's.

More don'ts:

Freeing Lae'zel from the goblin trap and recruiting her, even with minimal dialogue, no matter how you deal with the tieflings.

Getting too close to where Lae'zel is caged, even without triggering the scene in which you choose whether to free her.

Interacting with more than 1 broken goblin trap near the grove, even the ones that are not close to Lae'zel.

Triggering the battle at the gates to the Emerald Grove, even if you talk to no one and long rest post-battle without entering the gates

Wandering close enough to the grove that Durge mentions hearing something, even if you don't go any closer

Things you CAN do on day one without missing out on the scene:

Recruit Shadowheart and Astarion at the Nautiloid crash site in any order

If you are a spellcasting class (sorcerer, warlock, bard, etc), you can also recruit Gale without losing access to the scene. I haven't used every class for this scene yet, but Ranger does NOT get a class option even though they can cast spells. Monk might get one.

Defeat the 2-3 intellect devourers at the crash site (the number present depends on whether you are alone or have companions with you)

Search a mangled corpse on the riverbank for a flashback and pick any dialogue option you wish in the scene that follows

Use Speak with the Dead to chat with the corpses at the crash site (if the spell was obtained early via various mod sources)

Gain an inspiration point for Gale from successfully using Speak with the Dead on a body

Use the magic mirror to edit your Durge

Change everyone's camp clothes and dye items (if you have any dyes)

Talk to Shadowheart about your memory loss

Talk to Gale about your memory loss and your violent thoughts

Be nice to a Scared Boar near where you recruit Astarion for some approval from Shadowheart and Gale

Hop down and loot a chest under a rock near Astarion's recruitment spot (includes the Harper map and some potions of speed)

Loot goblin bodies for supplies near Gale's recruitment spot

Fight Gimblebock and crew outside the Overgrown Ruins, even if you choose the Durge dialogue, "I am not competition. I am annihilation."

Clear the top floor of the interior of the Overgrown Ruins of Gimblebock's remaining crew (Refectory level), including finding and opening the hidden door, but do NOT enter the lower level.

Accidentally get Gale killed, and complete his resurrection protocol... or have him jump off a cliff on purpose until he fails all his saving throws because wizard = squishy, and he never dies in your games because you protect your squish. Thus, you don't get to see this scene in most playthroughs...

As you can see, your Durge can have a fairly eventful first day back in Faerûn and still get this scene. Simply avoid getting inspirations for Durge, don't approach the Emerald Grove yet, don't enter the Dank Crypt, and don't recruit Lae'zel until day two.

You'll only permanently lose out on a single inspiration point (from embrace/resist as related to Gale).

[lesbiansforboromir]

Right, breaking my silence having 100%'ed the game. It is good. I had a good time with it, I love my Rook very much, I have made five more and I have to say that the final like 5 hours of that game kind of retroactively make the past 70 hours even cooler than they were.

But it is also so clear to me that it was sort of patched and cobbled together out of the rubble from multiple course changes. The pacing often feels rushed, the beginning of the game is just the same three conversations said over and over again, the companion scenes feel kind of truncated a lot of the time and some scene's dialogue is kind of on the nose in a way that feels like a second draft of the script rather than a finished version.

Like I can imagine after spending time trying to make it a live service game it would be very difficult to re-pivot back to a single player story focused experience. And like... honestly I was so miserable when I heard about the 'only three choices matter' situation, and only got more angry about it when the dev response was 'we didnt want to relegate decision acknowledgements into just codex entries' (Isabela, Dorian and Morrigan are persistent voiced characters in this game so it wouldnt have been ALL and also what's wrong with my beloved codex entries) and 'you don't really want us to bring back your favourite characters anyway we'll be mean to them' (god did that last one get to me I swear what were they even on about, #1 that has never been true for most character cameos in these games and #2 that is in fact exactly what I want actually)

BUT, the far more easily surmised answer to why they only acknowledged three choices was because they did not have the time or resources to write and record all those extra scenes for all the various possibilities that might be created if they accounted for more choices. And like, I know that is me guessing, but that also accounts for all the strange dialogue issues in general, it DOES feel like they are stitching together a workable narrative from a quite shallow pool of recorded dialogue and written material. WHICH KIND OF SUCKS IF I'M HONEST. And like, if you're wondering, they actually don't manage to not step on the toes of possible choices. Like at one point Isabella says 'Kirkwall taught her about family' but one of my Hawkes fully betrays her and lets the Arishok take her away so I'm not sure where the lesson in family was in that scenario! Blegh, idk it's one of those things where you're kind of sad that this game could have included so many more characters and met so many other plotlines and actually taken account of the worldstate I have been building for like more than a decade now! Which is kind of one of the major draws of the dragon age franchise!! if not for the usual EA nonsense.

[dogearedheart]

20 questions for fic writers

thank you @carpettmuncher for tagging me!

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

Only one :/ but I promise there will be more!

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

13,416!

3. what fandoms do you write for?

supernatural! I did think about writing some rdr2 stuff, but I'm not sure if I that's ever gonna happen

4. top five fics by kudos

well, i only ever published one fic. so the answer is 'at the end of all things'

5. do you respond to comments?

yes! I rarely get comments, but when I do, i try my best to reply because they mean a lot to me!

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I tend to write fics with happy endings, and I'm not very good at like... knowing if my fics are angsty. My fic 'we met at the end of eden' was supposed to be the first one with a kinda angsty/open ending, but I don't think I'm gonna go that route

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think my lesbian destiel fic (which is currently called the great divide) is gonna be super fucking sappy. It's got everything: stanford era destiel, love, despair, hope, cowboys and a good ending for them. It's more of an idea and fantasy, so I have no clue if it's actually gonna be a real thing... just because I have no idea if I'm gonna be able to like... not get to personal about it lol

8. do you get hate on fics? i haven't gotten any so far!

no, not yet anyway jehsjs

9. do you write smut?

I've never done it before, but it's gonna be part of 'we met at the end of eden'. it just fits into the story (i just hope it's gonna be like good because smut is actually something I have no idea how to write)

10. craziest crossover?

I've never done a crossover, but I am tempted to include arthur morgan in one of my wips

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

no!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, I thi

14. all-time favorite ship?

is that even a question? well, it all started- ����‍💨

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

all of them tbh. I'm joking! but idk I have a ones hot about lesbian destiel that I have no idea if I'm gonna finish, simply because I sometimes get too sad about it lol

16. what are your writing strengths?

I do enjoy writing dialogue a lot, especially inner dialogue. and like certain descriptions of feelings etc.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

definitely action. sometimes i just rush through scenes because I have no clue how to write what is happening know an appealing way :/ I'm should definitely work on that

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I mean, it's kinda weird? It always feels a little unnatural to me (as someone whose first language isn't english). So, I would write it into my fic, I think (especially when it's a language I don't speak and I would never write german stuff in my fic lol)

19. favorite fic you've written?

we met at the end of eden! it's just so close to my heart, and I think about it all the time. but i also like at the end of all things a lot :)

20. tagging: @limbel @gracefreakdean @roublardise and @mrcowboydeanwinchester (no pressure tho!)

[ranshoku]

after finding out that there wasn't just one, but (at least) two scraped Lopmon evolution scenes in chapter 5, I decided to check if there was a scraped Dracumon evolution scene in chapter 3...

...and found nothing 😭

On the other hand, found some other changes + interesting stuff that isn't included:

Kaito was supposed to meet the others at the school--he and Dracumon found the school, told everyone about what happened to him and Miu (also about Arukenimon), and everything else played out the same (i.e., the whole Minoru vs. Shuuji debate)

You know the scene where Takuma accidentally caught Saki changing clothes? It was initially going to be Minoru insinuating Ryo to go peek the girls changing to get him back to normal (and he did get Ryo to act normal... only for a bit. Ryo: "Are you nuts!? How is that supposed to make me feel better!?") Takuma happened to come across them at the wrong time, and when he was about to intervene Ryo and Minoru (I think?), Saki and Aoi came out, finding out the whole thing. Aoi tried to calm Saki down by saying that they must have not planned anything weird, but Saki was already mad and calling them perverted and stuff.

The affinity dialogue with Shuuji picking fruits has a reference to Shuuji's penchant for studying.

There's another affinity dialogue with Shuuji where Takuma caught Shuuji only eating half the portion, prompting him to ask if Shuuji was really done with his food. Shuuji said yes, and he only ate half the food because he wanted to save up food as much as he could. Takuma told him that he didn't need to do that because it'd take a toll on his health, to which Shuuji said that it was fine because he was the oldest here. The entire thing made Takuma wonder how Shuuji tends to get caught up in the weirdest thoughts. He also thought about how he looks up to Shuuji as an adult, but now that he thought about it again Shuuji was only a high school student and high school student was still a kid. Shuuji then dismissed Takuma to go check on Minoru and Ryo, but Takuma thought that he was as worried about Shuuji as he was about Minoru and Ryo.

When they're on the way to search Miu, Aoi noticed that there were spider webs and thought about how it might be something the enemy left to mark them.

Midway, Shuuji and Saki started angsting about Professor again, and Takuma would get to choose to scold them and blame them for Professor's death (not in a... mean way, Takuma just thought that maybe he should stop with the weak consolation, but it kinda backfired and he regretted how he went too far kahsdjdkhd)

Instead of Saki feeling exhausted, we got her spraining her foot on the way, so they had to stop for a while because of that.

They met Arukenimon (her human disguise) along the way. Kaito lost his patience midway and rushed off on his own to chase after her, and there was an entire scene of the other kids badmouthing him relentlessly kahdsjkhd

You got to pick whether to agree with Minoru+Saki (save Miu) or Aoi+Shuuji (head to the top of mountain to gather info first). Ryo was just off on his own.

During the scene at the radio tower, Ryo pulled out to see that his phone now had connection and started mumbling to himself about some stuff. Minoru was delighted to see it and was about to jokingly tease Ryo about it, but Ryo reacted very strongly and told Minoru and the other kids to not go near him. Everyone froze because they weren't expecting him to react that way. Ryo started suspecting the others of being monsters, and so Shuuji tried to calm him down saying that they weren't, but Ryo didn't believe it and ran away. Everyone panicked and chased after him.

We would have met Cyclomon first before we fought Arukenimon (we saw that Cyclomon and Arukenimon had Ryo hostage), not much changed except that Ryo's death scene didn't happen here if you managed to save him. If not, Arukenimon would have dropped Ryo and the scene in the final game played out more or less the same.

After beating Cyclomon, the kids saved Ryo and went after Arukenimon where we'd have also fought her near the cable car. If we hadn't used the alcohol lamp thing from the first chapter, we'd have the option to use it here to burn the webs--doing that would result in lesser Dokugumon to appear. Ryo, in a frenzy, went to the cable car because he saw his mom over there (the others panicked because Arukenimon kept talking about how it was the altar she prepared for the sacrifice). Haru followed him, and they panicked even more because "Are you expecting us to believe a kid like him can stop a middle schooler???"

Haru was actually trying to save Ryo. Ryo: "My mom is right there! Let go of me you brattttt" Haru: "That's not your mom... honestly, I would let you go here, but if I did that, it'd be the same as abandoning my sister…" After Haru said that, the others noticed how Ryo now looked a bit reluctant, giving them some time to catch up with Ryo and Haru. The other kids then started bodying him like in the final version and everyone talked him out of it but slightly longer, until they finally snapped Ryo out of it ("you're heavy, you idiots!")

Ryo, if you managed to save him: "Because... Ma-- my mom... when she last spoke to me, she said, 'Ryo is a strong kid, so he'll be okay.' That was… her last words…"

Ryo whispered something to Haru after the whole thing. Takuma was curious what he said Haru. Haru: "Nothing special. He just said 'I'm sorry.'" Takuma: "Really...? He really did that? Wow haha" Haru: "Maybe I should have kept it a secret." Takuma: "Ah well, maybe I'll keep that a secret too."

[mapizb99]

SPOILERS!

Thoughts on the awakening movie

Ok so I have thoughts, not very organized thoughts but thoughts nonetheless

1) why was Marinette’s voice actress when she was singing SO DIFFERENT from her speaking one??? It took me out of the movie every single time.

2) there were too many songs and the fact that none of them were Ce mur qui nous separe is heartbreaking. At the third Marinette song I was rolling my eyes. Plus they all felt pretty same-y and I didn’t think any of the, were particularly good.

3) the scenes felt SO disjointed! Like they had some cool storyboards but weren’t quite sure how to join them together.

4) the whole story felt kinda like that to me, like they couldn’t quite explore all the elements they wanted to include and relies a lot on the fact that we already know (and love) the characters, like if it was my first approach to the universe I’d feel like the movie was rushed and shallow.

5) on a more positive note the animation was incredibly beautiful, a few characters felt a little too baby faced but the lighting and textures really made this very pretty to look at.

6) what was Gabriel’s villain song? It’s like they had an interesting idea but they just couldn’t deliver (which unfortunately rings true for most of the movie)

7) related to Marinette and her many many songs was her character arc, it felt kinda all over the place, like her whole “gotta face my fears” lesson was learned like three different times and not once in a fulfilling way.

8) Alya was kinda mean at the beginning? Did anyone else feel that way?

9) Tikki’s rap was SO CRINGE and the bit in Hawkmoth’s song where he gets a hat and poses un a rap-y way was so weird as well. Like come to think of it they were probably referencing “friends in the other side” but it only makes this song seem way worse by comparison.

10) the movie had serious issues with its rhythm and pacing, with the whole story but also in every scene.

11) kinda related to that but their mouths sometimes would not move with the dialogue? At first I assumed it was because it was made for French first but I could very clearly read their lips in English just not in sync with the sound.

12) the kwamis (genies in this movie apparently, ugh) were characterized in such a weird way, it was like trying to be Tikki but not quite getting there. I did enjoy when she got all wide eyed and musterious, it kinda goes with her being super old and powerful.

13) Plagg??? Being mostly just a fart joke??? 0/10

14) that and Chat feeling so unimportant.

15) Chat also fell in love way to fast, and like it didn’t feel genuine? Like they barely knew each other and Marinette wasn’t like particularly impressive yet for him to be fawning over her.

16) after the little montage tho? I loved their dynamic and relationship, and I really liked their little fight on the roof

17) the movie was sprinkled with little scenes and moments that were enjoyable and well crafted, but even if they were emotional moments they just didn’t feel earned and were kinda buried under a bunch of mid scenes.

18) I did like that Hawkmoth was dealt with in the spam of one movie, 11/10 much more realistic for his abilities than 5 seasons.

19) most of the jokes didn’t land because the timing of them was so weird, like long pauses or they were delivered too fast.

In general there were some bits that I enjoyed and the animation was obviously gorgeous (even if the pacing brought it back a bit) but maybe I had too much hype but I was disappointed. Still I’m certainly inspired to try some fan art and will save stills from the movie cause they were so beautiful.

I probably didn’t make a lot of sense but I needed to get everything out there!

P.S. HOW COULD THEY CUT JUST BEFORE THE KISS?!! UGHHH!!!

[ryehouses]

ive said this before and I’ll say it again: Boba POV for his and Din’s first scene in the kitchens

this was by FAR one of the most requested boba povs -- seriously, i have like twelve of these in my inbox -- so i figured that it would be as good a POV to start on as any!

set during chapter 3, "sha'kajir." the content warnings relevant to that chapter, including some extremely preliminary kink negotiation, some mild non-sexual choking and some painplay, apply.

if you're like "wait, all of the dialogue is the same!" it is, but the ~inflection is different from a different pov.

enjoy!

in which boba fett makes an educated guess. 

If Din Djarin wound himself up any tighter, he was going to snap in half and scatter beskar all over the floor of Ushib’s tidy kitchen, and somehow, Boba didn’t think that Fennec would be very happy with him if he let that happen. 

He wouldn’t be very happy with himself either, honestly. Boba liked Djarin. His side still hurt where Djarin’d gone for a gap in Boba’s cuirass – twice – and he was trying his hardest not to limp where Djarin could see. The mean little lyleck had kicked Boba so hard that Boba was going to need to hobble around with a brace in the morning, though he’d be karked if he let Djarin notice. 

The whole point of getting him in the sparring ring was to get him to relax, Boba thought, watching Djarin across the quiet, dim kitchen. He’d found Djarin in one of the old pit fighting rooms, where Jabba and his court had bet on gladiators, and had brought Djarin here after their spar to put Djarin more at ease. To get him more comfortable. 

Djarin was not comfortable. 

He’d been willing enough to spar, when Boba had finally managed to track him down. For a man in bright silver armor – not even a sensible green, a red that would disappear in low light, a blue that would blend into the sky – Djarin’d been karking hard to find. But once Boba’d managed to dig him up, Djarin had  agreed to spar, and during the spar he had relaxed. Boba had been able to see Djarin. To learn about who he was underneath the armor. 

Any ease that Djarin’d found in the sparring ring was long gone now. He was staring at Boba, one hand curled around a cup of tihaar that he hadn’t yet touched, like he thought that Boba was going to rush him and stick a knife in his belly. His shoulders were pulled tight. His free hand was twitching for a weapon. 

I don’t particularly want to get stuck with the darksaber, either, Boba thought. I’ve already been whacked with that spear. Djarin had only used the blunt end to jab Boba – he was polite enough, for a Mandalorian – but still. Sparring was one thing. Sparring was fun. A good way to blow off some steam. Boba’d hoped that the spar had convinced Djarin that while Boba might whack him around a little in the sparring ring, Djarin wasn’t in any danger here at the palace. Boba wasn’t Bo-Katan Kryze. He had no interest in stabbing any of his allies in the back, no matter what they’d accidentally walked in on. 

I don’t have enough allies to go around betraying them, or to go around shooting them because I forgot to look my own karking door.  

Boba eyed Djarin for another minute, feeling an echo of Djarin’s stress in his own shoulders, behind his teeth, and then turned away, swallowing the tihaar in his own cup. The familiar smell, sharp alcohol and sweet fruit, warmed his mouth. He watched Djarin out of the corner of his eye. Djarin didn’t move, stiff and wary. It was like Boba’d invited a half-starved anooba into his home instead of one of the best fighters Boba’d ever seen.  

Boba sighed. “I thought maybe food and drink would put you at ease,” he admitted, apologetic. Boba had vague, old memories of his father passing around a bottle of tihaar with the Cuy’Val Dar, old grudges set aside while the bottle changed hands. He’d thought that sharing food and drink was a way to set a Mandalorian at ease, but the days of the Cuy’Val Dar were long over, and Boba’d never been very good about remembering what few Mandalorian custos he’d learned at his father’s knee anyway. “But we can do this up in my rooms, if that’ll help.” 

Boba hadn’t wanted to corner Djarin. He knew well enough how a cornered fighter would react, and Djarin hit pretty hard. But maybe Boba’s room, with its open walls and its starlight, would be better. Boba liked the kitchens, personally. Liked the smell of fresh japoor bread and chuba stew. It reminded him of the simpler days out in the desert, sharing a tent with Ushib. 

Boba hadn’t had much to worry about, then. Not getting killed by the Spotted Anooba’s chief, who’d hated outsiders. Not dying of the wounds inflicted by the sarlacc. Life had been easy. Simple. 

Then I had to go off and start a syndicate, Boba thought dryly. Though none of this was in the job description. 

Boba wasn’t sure what had set Djarin off. What made him so tense and wary here. He had walked in on Boba and Theran, but – 

The suggestion – the idea of going up to Boba’s rooms – made Djarin tenser. “Do what,” he said, tone flat. 

Kark. Boba poured himself another small measure of tihaar. Looking at Djarin head-on only seemed to put him more on guard. “Talk about what you walked in on,” Boba said. He’d been willing enough to dance around the issue, to use vague terms or euphemisms; most beings preferred it. Boba’d prefer to keep Theran’s privacy, if he could, but he also needed Djarin to be sharp, if he was going to stick around with the outfit, and Djarin couldn’t be sharp if he was fretting over what he’d seen. 

Djarin was fretting over it. He was so stiff that Boba was half-worried that Djarin would fall over. 

Is it me he’s afraid of? Boba wondered, and the thought tasted sour in his mouth. Respect was one thing. Boba didn’t particularly mind being feared by his enemies either. 

But Djarin – Djarin wasn’t an enemy. Not now, at least. Once he got tired of hanging around on Tatooine and karked off back to the other Mandalorians, he might end up on the other side of a battlefield some day, but here and now, he wasn’t Boba’s enemy. 

“I’m not Jabba, you know,” said Boba, aiming for a light, unbothered tone. Djarin had said that he’d done a few jobs for Jabba. He probably knew how Jabba’d handled things in his court. 

This isn’t Jabba’s court. It’s not going to be Jabba’s court again. 

Boba had promised the universe quite a few things, when he’d been sitting in the sarlacc’s belly. He had decided, if he lived, that he was going to be better than Jabba. Better than Boba himself had been. 

“I’m not gonna have you dropped down into the rancor pit just because you walked in on me enjoying some of my – ” Boba hesitated for a split second, unsure how to describe what he’d been doing with Theran to someone like Djarin. 

For a Mandalorian, Djarin was – different. Boba hadn’t figured out just what it was about him that was different, but Djarin was nothing like the few Mandalorians Boba’d run into over the years. Boba didn’t know anything about him. He didn’t know if Djarin understood what he’d seen, between Boba and Theran. 

“ – odder pastimes,” Boba finished, wincing internally as he did it. He wasn’t very good at coming up with words on the spot. Odder pastimes wasn’t the best description of what Boba and Theran did together, but –

“Is that what it was?” Djarin asked, sounding tentative. “I didn’t – ” he paused too, and Boba wondered if he was blushing under his helmet. 

Boba paused. Pinned that thought down. 

Now where, he thought, did that come from? 

“How you punish your people isn’t any of my business,” Djarin continued hastily, pulling Boba back to the matter at hand. “I just heard – through the door, I heard what sounded like someone in pain.” 

Boba had to blink for a moment, surprised. 

Well, that’ll teach us to play on the main floor, he thought. Theran hated Boba’s rooms. He was as brave as a bladeback, Theran, and had been for as long as Boba’d known him, but Theran was terrified of heights and their old arrangement – renting a room in a cantina somewhere in Mos Eisley – was more dangerous now that Boba was trying to set up an outfit of his own. 

And I wasn’t punishing Theran, either. Theran didn’t go for punishment. He preferred regular, quick sessions, a few licks of the flogger to take him out of his own head for a little while. That was all. For anything heavier Boba would have insisted on his own rooms, or on a different suite. The room Theran’d chosen hadn’t had anywhere for Boba to stash any of his medical supplies, any snacks, anything that Theran might need as he came back up once he’d finished letting Boba bring him down.  

“Theran and I have an arrangement,” Boba said, watching Djarin to see if Djarin would understand the difference between the two. Punishment and arrangement. 

It was harder to guess what Djarin was thinking with all of his beskar on. That helmet was blank. Unchanging. The set of Djarin’s shoulders told Boba that he was uncomfortable, but little else. 

“He knew me before, when all of this – ” Boba gestured at the kitchens, which weren’t really much to look at, but meant the palace above them too – “was Jabba’s. We.. have compatible interests.”

Djarin’s confusion was almost palpable. “Compatible… interests?” he asked, still tentative. 

Boba tried not to wince. C’mon, Mando, you know what I’m talking about. 

Boba’s preferences weren’t necessarily common, but he was hardly the only man in the galaxy who enjoyed wielding a whip. Theran was hardly the only man who liked to be whipped. 

“Ni gaa’tayl,” he muttered to himself, hoping it was quiet enough to escape Djarin’s notice. Boba didn’t know enough mando’a to hold a full, complete conversation with a real Mandalorian and didn’t feel much like dealing with Mandalorian ossik tonight anyway, but sometimes the handful of phrases Boba still remembered from his days on Kamino were the only phrases that felt like they fit how he was feeling. 

Right now, I need all the help I can get, Boba thought. He studied Djarin, trying to figure out what to do.

Best to just – go for it, Boba thought. Boba had never been very good at being subtle. “Yeah, compatible interests. He likes – to give someone else control over his body,” Boba said, trying to explain his and Theran’s arrangement in vague enough terms that Boba wouldn’t completely run over Theran’s privacy, though Theran himself didn’t much care. 

He could tell that Djarin still didn’t understand, though. The Mandalorian had cocked his head a little, listening, like a curious anooba cub. Boba squashed the flicker of amusement and kept going. 

“He likes pain,” Boba said. “He likes… someone to look after him, to decide what he feels and when he feels it.” 

There, thought Boba. That’s about the gist of it, without digging into the specifics. Djarin should understand. Boba’d seen Djarin fight. Had watched him come up with plans, with strategies. Djarin wasn’t stupid. He could figure it out. 

Djarin, if anything, pulled his shoulders up even higher. “And you…” he said, trailing off before he managed to voice an actual question. 

Something about the way that Djarin was sitting – the way that he was looking at Boba, the way that Boba knew that Djarin wasn’t looking him in the eye, even though Djarin was wearing a helmet – scratched lightly at the edge of Boba’s awareness. Felt almost – familiar. 

Boba cocked his head and looked harder at Djarin, trying to see the man underneath the armor. “Like to take control, yeah,” Boba said. In for a peggat, he thought. There was no harm in describing his own preferences. Anybody who’d spent more than five minutes in a room with Boba knew that he liked to be in control. Boba’d accepted that part of himself a long time ago. 

“Like to cause pain, too.” 

Boba saw the moment that Djarin understood. His shoulders twitched, just a little, like Djarin had brushed a live wire.

Interesting. The feeling of familiarity scratching at the back of Boba’s head itched harder. 

“...Oh,” said Djarin. He set his cup of tihaar, still untouched, down on the counter beside him. He didn’t immediately sneer anything derogatory and he didn’t try to bolt, either. Boba watched him carefully for a second, then relaxed. 

Djarin understood. 

He was still tense, though. 

He said that he thought that he heard someone in pain, Boba thought. He came to help. 

Before Boba and Fennec had set off after Djarin – after Djarin had left Tatooine with Boba’s armor, not knowing what it was that he was taking away – Boba’d done a bit of research. He hadn’t been able to find the man’s name, not until Djarin’d shared it, but rumors of a Mandalorian in silver armor fighting the Empire, driving off pirates and rescuing towns from Greater karking Krayt Dragons echoed all over the galaxy. Djarin had helped a lot of people. Had killed a lot of people, honestly, but Boba’d done his own share of killing and wasn’t bothered by it, and all of Djarin’s killing had been pretty straightforward and clean, too. He wasn’t a torturer. He wasn’t cruel. 

He heard Theran cry out, and he came to help. 

“‘S not as bad as you’re worried about, Djarin,” Boba said gently, trying to set the other man more at ease. Theran didn’t notice, and he doesn’t mind an audience anyway. It’s just – it’s a matter of discretion, yeah?” 

“I won’t tell anyone,” Din said hastily, and Boba could hear him blushing. “I’m not – I don’t share other people’s secrets.” 

Boba almost smiled. “No, you wouldn’t,” he said, trying not to laugh at Djarin. Boba’d already known that Djarin could be trusted, at least a little. Djarin was the Resol’nare walking. “You’ve got your honor.” 

Djarin relaxed a little. 

Something in Boba’s gut twinged. Settled. Like Boba had just rounded a corner in Mos Eisley and come face to face with someone in the crowd, like he’ reached for his blaster, but instead of finding an enemy, had found someone that he could trust. 

Recognition. 

The way that Djarin was sitting – the way that he was looking at Boba – Boba recognized it. Had seen it before. 

“But that’s not all I wanted to talk to you about,” Boba added on instinct, though he felt a little bad when Djarin immediately froze. Boba paused for a fraction of a second, debating whether he should follow what his instincts were telling him or just let Djarin go, send him off to work through what he’d just learned on his own, but – 

But something about the way that Djarin was looking at Boba – something about the way that Djarin had fought in the sparring ring, about the way he carried himself – made Boba say, “Sometimes, pain is good.” 

Later, Boba wouldn’t be able to say what it was about Djarin that told him that Djarin was like Theran. Sometimes there were clues. A certain pattern of speech, a certain look, an intake of breath when Boba stood close. Sometimes beings who wanted what Theran wanted just came up to Boba and karking asked. Sometimes it was just a feeling.

With Djarin, it was just a feeling. 

“For some it’s a focus,” Boba continued. “Or a reminder, or a reason.” 

“Is that why you were.. Was it to help Theran?” Djarin asked. He was still holding himself very still. Boba wondered what Djarin would be doing if he’d let himself move. If he’d pick up his cup of tihaar again, or if he’d try to leave. If he’d put a hand over his thigh, over the plate of armor Boba’d hit with his gaderffii, and try to feel the bruise that Boba was sure was growing there. 

A spark of interest licked the back of Boba’s ribs. Trying not to show it – it’d never paid for Boba to play his hand too early, even if he’d had a perfect sabacc – Boba just said, “That’s between me and Theran.” 

What Theran got out of a flogging session was Theran’s concern. Boba’s too, of course – Boba tried to make sure that everyone he played with got what they needed – but it was private, even if Djarin would get something similar out of a flogging session himself. 

Would he? Boba wondered. He is Mandalorian. He ought to be used to using pain, or at least to fighting through it. 

Djarin was a frighteningly competent fighter. Boba knew that the Empire – even the Remnants – had tended to value their own pride over any kind of self-awareness, but if Boba’d been Gideon, he would’ve thought twice before trying to interfere with Djarin’s clan. Djarin had a shriek-hawk’s temper. 

Most of the best fighters had a more intimate relationship with pain than the average being. It came with being hit in the head – and the chest, the gut, kicked in the knee, grappled – so karking often. Djarin was one of the better fighters Boba’d seen. 

Djarin, fidgeting more obviously now, picked his cup of tihaar again and brought it up almost protectively, though he still didn’t make any move to take his helmet off. 

The flicker of amusement in Boba’s chest was brighter now, and it wasn’t as easy to quash. 

He tilted his head, considering. 

I can just let it go here, he thought. He’d explained himself to Djarin. Djarin’d promised that he wouldn’t go spilling the details of Boba’s arrangement with Theran all over the palace. Their business with each other, at least for the night, was done. 

But that instinct – that recognition, searing and bone-deep – wouldn’t let go of Boba, so he said, “Your buy’ce.” He drummed his fingers over his own helmet almost absently. “Can you take it off?” 

He wanted to see Djarin’s face. His eyes. 

Boba knew that there were some groups of Mandalorians who preferred to show their faces only to their families or their close allies. Djarin and Boba weren’t close. They’d known each other for just a little more than a week, and for part of that week Djarin had been unconscious in a bacta tank after defeating a Remnant Moff and upsetting Bo-Katan Kryze’s plan in one swoop. 

But Boba still wanted to see his eyes. 

Djarin clearly hadn’t been expecting the question. He startled, which caught Boba by surprise – he hadn’t seen Djarin startle before. Then Djarin sat up straight, chin up, that fierce lylek look plain even through his armor, and put his tihaar cup back down.  

Boba watched Djarin flex his fingers a few times. 

Interesting, he thought. He wasn’t surprised, though. Just about any being or beast had two reflexes, when surprised; fight or flight. With Mandalorians – with Boba too, either through persistent genetics, training or plain experience – the response was almost always fight. 

Djarin managed to master his urge to punch Boba, though. Boba saw him take a deep breath. Djarin sat up straighter. Boba watched him, intrigued. 

“Why?” Djarin asked. 

That was an easy enough question to answer. 

“Because I want to ask you something,” Boba said. “And I’d prefer to see your face while I do it. If that’s alright?” 

Djarin started at Boba for a handful of seconds. He’d gone stiff again, wound tight with tension, and all that energy would eventually have to go somewhere – Djarin titled his helmet a little and Boba could tell that Djarin was looking for a way out. 

Boba realized that he was between Djarin and the door and tried not to wince. 

Don’t corner him, he reminded himself. That’s going just gonna get you punched again, Fett, or worse. Djarin had already kicked Boba in his bad knee once tonight. 

But Boba knew how to manage this sort of reaction too. Moving very carefully, slow and deliberate, Boba shifted over to the side, leaving a clear path between Djarin and the door out into the hall, ready to let Djarin go if Djarin wanted to. 

Djarin didn’t move. 

Boba let him think about it. He could be patient. He hadn’t become the best bounty hunter in Jabba’s outfit by rushing headlong into things. Boba knew how to wait his prey out. 

Thinking of Djarin as prey, something to be caught – tamed – made Boba’s heart beat a little faster in his chest. Djarin’d put up a fight. He would. Boba knew that he would. It’d be fun. He squashed that feeling too. 

This was about Djarin. 

Finally, after several tense, frozen seconds, Djarin obeyed and reached up, curling his fingers around the edges of helmet. Most buc’ye – buckets – were the same, even if the shape and the features were different. Djarin released the seals with a hiss of compressed air and tugged his helmet off in one sharp move, like Djarin thought he’d stop halfway if he tried to pull it off slowly. 

Djarin blinked in the light, and Boba hid the frown that wanted to pull at his mouth. 

The last time Boba’d seen Din Djarin’s face, the man had been fresh out of a bacta tank. He’d looked terrible. The bacta had kept Djarin’s brain from leaking out of his ears – Boba’d seen the hole in the wall where some kind of new superdroid had done its best to kill Djarin – but even bacta could only do so much, and the last time Boba’d seen his face, Djarin had looked half-dead. Pale, bruised and exhausted, the old, half-visible scars on his face stark in the artificial light of the med bay. 

Despite the fact that it had been a few weeks since then, Djarin still looked awful. The bruises had all faded, but he had shadows under his eyes. His hair, a curly, soft-looking brown, stuck up untidily. His face was thinner, more worn, and the scar between his eyes still stood out, even in the low light. 

What happened? Boba wondered, alarmed. Djarin’d only been on Tatooine for a few days – he couldn’t have been that badly-injured out on his hunt. Boba knew that Fennec had made sure that Djarin had eaten, the night he’d landed on Tatooine. Djarin hadn’t been with them long enough to get this tired. This worn. 

Kryze, Boba thought, darkly. He should’ve known that she’d be too busy with her own karking plans to make sure that her guests – her allies – were well taken care of. 

Djarin held Boba’s eyes for a second. His eyes were dark too, like Boba’s. Kryze and her people all had blue or green eyes. Kalevalan Mandalorians were fair-skinned and fair-haired. Boba’d gone to Keldabe once, when he’d been younger and stupider, convinced that he could scratch out a living for himself among his father’s father’s people, and had been shocked to see how few Mandalorians actually looked like Jango Fett. 

Then Djarin’s eyes darted away again, anxiety plain in Djarin’s face. 

Boba softened. Djarin’d had a long few days, and he was clearly out of his depth.

“Jate,” he said, hoping that the common language would set Djarin more at ease. Djarin started at the word again, his eyes skipping back to Boba’s own for a second, but he did relax some. He rubbed a globed thumb absently over an invisible mark on his bright silver helmet, his eyes finally settling on the side of Boba’s face. 

Not a big fan of eye contact? Boba wondered. If Djarin kept his helmet on in front of everybody but his clan, Boba supposed that that made sense, though he didn't like the way Djarin kept looking sideways at Boba, nervous and tense.

“You don’t show your face often, huh?” he asked. 

Djarin just shrugged, raising one stiff shoulder and dropping it down. He looked at Boba’s cheek for another second, then met Boba’s eyes again. Djarin’s jaw was tight. He clutched his helmet like he wanted to pull it back down over his ears. 

He didn’t, though. He looked Boba in the eye and said, with a bit of a challenge in his voice, “Well?” 

Boba blinked at thim. 

Right, he thought. We were having a conversation. 

Boba let himself hesitate for another second, then pushed on. He’d learned over the years to trust his instincts, and this instinct, this feeling of familiarity – 

I think, Boba said to himself, that Djarin is – like me. Like Theran. He couldn’t say what it was, exactly, but Djarin has hesitated at the door, when he’d walked in on Boba flogging Theran. He’d stared for a second longer than he should have. 

“What’s your relationship with pain?” Boba asked, deciding to take pity on Djarin and cut straight to the point.

It was Djarin’s turn to blink at Boba. “Uh, what?” 

He didn’t bolt, which was a good sign. “What’s your relationship with pain?” Boba repeated, keeping his tone friendly and even. “Good, bad, want it, don’t want it? Does it distract you, or does it help you focus?” 

“Nobody wants,” Djarin began, tone hot and defensive, but he caught himself before Boba could correct him. He would’ve done it gently, but still. Djarin was wrong. Plenty of people wanted pain. Wanted to take it or to give it. 

Djarin chewed his lip, eyes darting up to meet Boba’s again. He was flushed faintly, the tips of his ears red, and that familiar feeling in Boba’s chest hardened into certainty. 

Cyar’yc, he couldn’t help but think, amusement uncurling in his belly. Sweet. 

“Have you ever thought about it?” Boba asked, gently. Gentleness didn’t come very easy to Boba, but he had learned it, over the years. It took more effort to be gentle than to be cruel, but gentleness had its place, even on Tatooine, and Boba found himself wanting to be gentle with Djarin, at least for now. He didn’t know Djarin well enough to know how to push him, yet. To know how far Djarin was willing to be pushed before he fought back. 

“About letting someone hurt you?” he continued. 

Boba saw Djarin swallow, and satisfaction flared bright behind his ribs. 

“Letting someone – no,” Djarin said. One of his hands twitched towards the bruise that Boba knew was darkening across the top of his thigh, but Djarin didn’t touch it. 

“Why?” Boba asked, curious. There must’ve been Mandalorians who enjoyed dominance or submission. Pain and pleasure. Boba’d never been one of them, but Mandalorians were beings just like any other. 

Djarin didn’t answer Boba right away. He shook his head a little, fingers tight around his helmet. 

“Why not?” Boba said, pushing just a bit. Djarin could take it. 

Boba’s persistence got a reaction. Djarin bared his teeth a little and snapped, sharp as a blade, “I shouldn’t need it. The only things a warrior needs are his armor and his courage.” 

Boba almost rolled his eyes. Mando ossik, he thought. Djarin wore his armor proudly, though – and took his rules seriously – so Boba didn’t disparage his people to his face. 

“Those are important,” Boba agreed. “But a warrior can’t march on just courage, you know.” 

Djarin bared his teeth again, studying Boba’s chin intently. “Why are you asking?” he challenged. 

Boba rather thought that it was obvious. “You’re Mandalorian,” he said. “A warrior. Warriors have… an interesting relationship with pain. The good ones, anyway,” he said, throwing Djarin the compliment. Anybody who could defeat an Imperial Moff was a good warrior. Boba’d seen Djarin fight on Tython. Kark, he’d seen Djarin fight here. Boba’d be carrying bruises underneath his cuirass for a good few days. 

Djarin didn’t soften. 

“Not just anyone can push themselves through training,” Boba pointed out. “Some warriors… they get through it because they have to, but others get through it because they like it. Pain helps them focus. Helps them center themselves.” 

Djarin’s shoulders went up again, tense and miserable. 

In for a peggat, Boba reminded himself. “I think it might help you,” he said, still gentle. He looked at Djarin’s leg. He could almost see the bruise that would be blooming there, underneath his silver beskar. Boba hit hard; he could crush a stormtrooper’s helmet with his gaderffii, if he put enough power behind the swing. He could crack skulls, break rocks. Boba couldn’t break beskar, but underneath the armor was just a man, and men bruised. 

Djarin’s flush was spreading. His dark eyes were wide. 

“And,” said Boba, laying down the last of his cards, “I think that you want it, though it’s hard to tell when you’ve got your armor on.” 

 Djarin twitched again, his whole body shivering with the urge to slam his helmet back on. Boba wondered what had made Djarin so defensive. He still wasn’t looking Boba in the eye. 

“Just because I want something doesn’t mean that I need it,” Djarin said. It hurt him to speak, Boba could see that it hurt him, but he made himself speak anyway. 

Brave, thought Boba. And honest. 

“No,” he agreed. “But that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have it, either.” 

That won Boba a derisive snort. “I’ve lived this long without it,” Din said. “I’m not – I’m an effective warrior. I provide for the tribe, I haven’t lost a bounty in years, I brought in renown for the Guild – ”

That one sentence had more words in it than Boba thought he’d ever heard Djarin say at one time. Boba wanted to frown again, but managed to avoid it. Djarin was still watching him with wide, wary eyes. 

“Yeah,” Boba said, holding up a hand. Djarin was a battle-trained warrior – he knew how to watch for hand signals, how to obey them, and his mouth clicked shut mid-sentence. 

“I’ve seen you fight, Djarin,” Boba said, trying to reassure the other man. “I know you’re capable.” His knee throbbed helpfully. Djarin had kicked Boba without a second thought. Without hesitation. “I’m gonna have a few bruises of my own when the suns rise.” 

Djarin looked at Boba like he wanted to keep arguing, but managed to hold off. 

Jate, Boba wanted to say. “All I meant is that if you want more,” Boba said, deciding to help Djarin out, “if you want to see what pain could do for you, well.” Boba gestured at himself. “You’re in a good place to try it out, is all.” 

“With you?” Djarin said. 

“If you wanted,” Boba replied, evenly. He was hardly the only man in Mos Eisley who knew how to swing a flogger, though. Djarin didn’t strike Boba as the type of man to trust that kind of vulnerability – his bare back, his submission – to a stranger, but then he really didn’t know Djarin very well, and had only gotten this far with him on instinct. If Djarin wanted to visit some cantina in Mos Eisley and find a stranger to flog him, that was his business, not Boba’s. 

“A few of the palace guards, some beings in Mos Eisley,” Boba continued, determined to give Djarin options. “Fennec, even, though she usually doesn’t play with men. She likes you enough she’d be willing to help out.” 

It had been Fennec’s idea to contact Djarin, actually. She liked Djarin. Respected him. 

Despite that, Djarin made a face, an open, honest expression, and Boba laughed. Djarin flushed again. The curl of amusement in Boba’s belly broadened. 

“Fennec’s out, then?” he asked. 

Djarin didn’t say anything for a while. Boba let him have his silence. Djarin was obviously thinking, and that was really all that Boba could ask from him. If Djarin really hadn’t thought of this before – had never considered intentional pain as a tool, as a relief – then Boba’d give him the time he needed to think about it. 

“What would it… how would I know?” Djarin asked, tentative again. The flush creeping down his neck was distracting. “If I wanted it? If it would… help me?” 

Boba could only shrug, spreading his hands. “I can’t answer that for you,” he said, repaying Djarin’s honesty with his own. “You’d just take it slow, and stop it if there was something happening that you didn’t like.” 

Djarin blinked at Boba again. “Stop it?” 

“Yeah,” said Boba. “In an arrangement – ” which wasn’t the right word, exactly, but was as close as Boba could get without needing to walk Djarin through a thirty-minute lecture – “either party, you or me, if you wanted to try it with me, or you and whoever else you picked, can stop at any time.” 

“Oh,” said Djarin. Doubt still flickered across his face, but there was something else in his eyes too. Curiosity, and something deeper than curiosity. 

Hunger, Boba thought, excitement beginning to build in his chest. 

Technically, he didn’t need to show Djarin anything tonight. Boba’s sessions with Theran were usually pretty short, but Theran was so used to Boba by now – and Boba so used to Theran – that Theran slid to his knees as soon as he walked into the room and gave up control of his body to Boba without a second thought. Boba was satisfied. It had been a good session, despite Djarin walking into it near the end. Boba was comfortable in his own skin. Settled. Between the flogging and the fight, Boba would sleep better tonight than he usually did. 

But the hunger in Djarin’s eyes had a similar hunger rising in Boba, an answer to the question Djarin hadn’t yet asked. 

Djarin licked his lips, then said, “How would I stop it?” 

The faint hunger deepened. “There’s a word, usually,” Boba said. He rattled off a few that he’d used before. “Gev, rahm, luubid, something like that.” A mix of mando’a and tuskra. Djarin ought to know both. 

“Gev,” Din repeated. “It’s that easy?” 

Boba nodded. “It’s that easy,” he said. 

The keen hunger in Djarin’s face shifted. He looked – 

Ravenous, Boba thought. Djarin looked starved. Like he hadn’t eaten for a week, lost in the desert, and had stumbled across a full feast. 

Pushing Djarin now could backfire. If he hadn’t considered pain a tool before, rushing him headlong into a scene probably was likely a bad idea. Boba didn’t know what Djarin liked. What his limits were. He didn’t know if Djarin just wanted pain or if he wanted more. If he’d like to be held down. If he’d want to get on his knees. 

But the look in his eyes, sharp with longing – 

Boba decided to risk it. “Here,” he said, taking a cautious, slow step closer. He left his helmet and his cup of tihaar behind. Djarin didn’t bolt. That was good. “Let me show you. Remember your word? Gev to get me to stop, alright?” 

Djarin tensed again as Boba got closer to him, but made no move to fight. “Alright,” he agreed, wary as a wraid. He shifted like he was going to stand, but Boba shook his head. He didn’t need Djarin to stand, not for this. 

Djarin hesitated as Boba got even closer, but still didn’t pull away. 

If he does, I’ll stop, Boba thought. Djarin didn’t really know what a safeword was, not yet. Not like Theran did. If he pulled back, if he tried to leave, Boba’d let him. 

Djarin just tilted his chin up. He met Boba’s eyes this time. 

Boba grinned. Mando pride, he thought. “Confident,” he said, close enough now for Djarin to touch. Boba got between Djarin and the counter where Djarin had set his cup of tihaar. That way, Djarin could bolt right or left if he had to, and get to the door without Boba blocking his path. Djarin didn't seem like he was going to bolt now, but Boba remembered how tense Djarin'd been when he'd realized that Boba had been between him and the door. “I like that.” 

Djarin shivered a little. He was warm. Boba was close enough now to feel the heat of his body. Moving slowly and carefully, Boba took a hand and did what he’d wanted to do since he’d brought his gaderffii down on Djarin in the sparring ring. He set his hand on top of Djarin’s thigh plate. Curled his fingers around the smooth edges of that beskar. 

The metal was cold. Djarin wasn’t. He went still when Boba touched him. His eyes went wide. Boba smiled at him, amused again, and pushed. 

He did it lightly enough. Boba couldn’t see what Djarin’s leg looked like, not like this, and he didn’t want to cause true pain. He just wanted Djarin to see what Boba’d been talking about. To understand. 

As soon as Boba pressed down, Djarin growled and jerked, twisting like he meant to lurch off the stool towards Boba. It was another, easy instinct for Boba to take his free hand and catch Djarin by the throat. 

He did that gently too, or at least did it as gently as he could. There wasn’t really a soft way to grab a man by the throat, and the look in Djarin’s eyes, wild and challenging, told Boba that Djarin didn’t want Boba to be soft. 

Still, choking Djarin out wasn’t something that Djarin’d agreed to and it wasn’t the kind of thing that Boba wanted to do without talking to Djarin first – without knowing for sure that Djarin would understand just what it was that he was agreeing to – so Boba was careful to keep his grip loose. 

He set his thumb at the corner of Djarin’s jaw. Even through his gloves, Boba could feel Djarin’s pulse hammering wildly. Djarin was still for another fraction of a second, and then his own instincts kicked in and he reached up to try to pry Boba’s hand away from his throat. His helmet fell from his hands, clattering against the floor. 

“None of that, now,” said Boba firmly, keeping his grip steady. If Djarin struggled, he’d hurt himself. Djarin stared at Boba, eyes wild, but obeyed. His immediate obedience made Boba want to smile. 

“Relax,” Boba added, as Djarin’s heart beat hard against Boba’s thumb. “You can still breathe, yeah?” 

Djarin took a few shallow breaths, his throat working against Boba’s palm. Boba didn’t loosen his grip, but he gave Djarin a few more seconds to realize that he was alright. 

“I need to hear you say it,” Boba said. “Can you breathe?” 

Djarin finally blinked, swallowing. “Yes,” he said. His voice had changed. Without his vocorder, Djarin sounded – uncertain. There was a hesitance to him that his helmet usually hid. He finally looked Boba in the eyes, too, and Boba could see Djarin’s shock. His confusion.  

“Jate,” said Boba warmly, immediately rewarding Din’s obedience. Djarin’s eyes widened at the praise. Boba couldn’t help but soften, instinctively adjusting his approach. He didn’t know what Djarin wanted just yet, but praise was usually well-received. “Very good,” Boba said. He didn’t have enough mando’a to tell Djarin to let go of his hand. 

Both of Djarin’s hands were wrapped around Boba’s. Djarin had a good grip. A warrior’s grip. He could break Boba’s hold, if he wanted to. 

“I want you to let go of my hand, alright?” Boba said, speaking slowly so that Djarin could hear him over the adrenaline, the confusion, that must be crashing through him now. 

Djarin blinked. His grip didn’t loosen. 

“Grip the edge of the counter, if you have to,” Boba said. Theran didn’t need anything to hold onto during a session, but it was alright if Djarin did. “But I need you to let go. I can make you, if you need me to.” 

Boba’d have to let go of Djarin’s leg to break his grip, but that wouldn’t be the worst thing. Djarin had given Boba a hell of a fight in the sparring ring, but here, now, Djarin was off-balance. Unsteady. 

Djarin swallowed again, looking a bit like Boba’d punched him between the eyes, and finally obeyed. His fingers loosened, one by one, and Djarin let go of Din’s hand. 

He did grab the counter, one hand on either side of Boba, clutching the wood so hard that Boba heard his gloves creak, but he let go of Boba’s hand. 

“Good,” Boba praised again, watching as Djarin swayed towards him like he’d been caught in a gravity well. Like he couldn’t stay away. 

Boba liked this part. His own heartbeat picked up, not as fast as Djarin’s, but fast enough. 

“Very good,” Boba repeated. “Don’t let go.” 

Djarin didn’t say anything. He’d heard Boba, Boba knew that he had. He applied just a bit of pressure to Djarin’s throat. Djarin’s breath caught again, a sweet little sound and a dark sort of satisfaction preened in Boba’s chest. 

Maybe I didn’t burn as much off with Theran as I thought. 

“I need to tell you that you understand,” Boba said. 

Djarin stirred again, heart hammering, but managed to say, voice thick, “Yes. Yes, I understand.” 

Boba made a pleased noise. “This is going to hurt,” he warned. He made sure that his grip on Djarin’s throat was loose, so that Djarin could breathe without trouble, and then returned his attention to the plate of armor across the top of Djarin’s thigh. 

Slowly and deliberately, Boba began to push. 

Djarin lasted three or four seconds before he made a sound, a low, thin noise of pain. It was as sweet as music. Djarin’s eyes met Boba’s again and his pupils were almost entirely blown, his eyes black in the dim light of the kitchen. Djarin’s mouth parted.

He wanted to collapse against Boba’s body, but he wasn’t letting himself. Djarin stayed straight as his spear, shoulders back, chin still tilted defiantly. That was alright. Boba had some time. 

He kept pushing. Pressure bruises weren’t really Boba’s specialty, but he understood the theory, and it’d be a good demonstration for Djarin, one that would show him what Boba meant about pain without scaring him or putting Djarin on his knees. 

I do want to put him on his knees, Boba thought, the desire flashing through him. He’d look good on his knees. 

This wasn’t about what Boba wanted, though. Djarin caught another thin sound of pain, gritting his teeth, and tried to pull away from Boba again, though he didn’t let go of the counter, so Boba was fairly confident that Djarin wasn’t really trying to get away. He watched Djarin’s mouth closely, ready to let go at the first sign of gev, but Djarin didn’t say it. 

“Easy,” Boba soothed, resisting the urge to lean in and nose at Djarin’s temple. Djarin kept fighting. Boba sighed. “You’re stubborn, you know that?” 

Djarin flashed his teeth again, snarling at Boba, and another wave of amusement rose and fell behind Boba’s ribs. 

He did like Djarin. Djarin was a fighter. 

“Easy, Djar’ika,” Boba said, the name falling off of his tongue before Boba could snatch it back. It wasn’t a conventional nickname, as far as Mandalorian nicknames went, but Boba liked the sound of it better than Din’ika, and he hadn’t yet called Djarin by his first name anyway. 

Djarin evidently felt otherwise, because he jerked again at the nickname and made a sound like an angry anooba. 

Boba couldn’t help but laugh. “Easy,” he said again, trying to help Djarin understand. He didn’t ease up on Djarin’s leg and he didn’t let go of Djarin’s throat, either. “Don’t fight me so hard. Lean into it. Let it happen.” 

Djarin showed no sign of listening, so Boba tried something else. For Theran, it was mostly about the pain. Theran didn’t care much for restraints, for being held down, for being made to take a flogging. 

But Djarin was Mandalorian, and Mandalorians were peculiar. Proud. Mando ossik, Boba thought. Maybe Djarin would only let himself enjoy this once he realized that he couldn’t get out of it. 

“It’s not like you have any other choice, yeah?” Boba asked, following the instinct. He’d made pretty good guesses so far, anyway, and decided that he might as well keep following his luck. “Unless you have something you want to say?” Boba loosened his grip, reminding Din that he could speak, if he wanted to. If Djarin didn’t like this – if he was really struggling, and not just putting up a token fight because he thought that he had to – he could stop it with a word. 

Uncertainty flickered across those dark eyes of Djarin’s. He panted against Boba’s hand. He was tense again, wound taut, and his breath came short with fear. 

But he didn’t say gev. He didn’t say gev. He looked Boba in the eye, his teeth half-bared in pain, and didn’t ask Boba to stop. 

Boba smiled at him. Stroked a thumb against the corner of Djarin’s jaw. 

Djar’ika, he thought. “I think,” Boba said. “That I can help.”

[trillscienceofficer]

Fic commentary (DVD extras style) on chapter 2 of “Best Left”, which is when the plot and the drama really kick into gear.

(The commentary for chapter 1 is here.)

Inside, it’s all blue shadows again, except for the faint green lighting of the regenerator coming from a few meters away from the door. Standing immobile under it, Seven’s silhouette. Raffi rushes to her. It is simple enough to wake Seven—there’s a built-in emergency shut-off, a large red physical switch which she had shown to Raffi during the building process. She can easily spot it even in the green glow of the machine, grey rather than red.

As I mentioned in the previous installment of the commentary, I spent some time wondering about the regeneration device(s) Seven might use in the Picard timeline. I liked the idea of a big physical switch that could quickly power down the machine, it added to the image of 'built out of readily-available components' I wanted to convey, although obviously is it's just one of the ways in which it can be powered down. I have to imagine that this regeneration device can be connected to the ship's computer so that Seven can be woken up if there's an emergency and is alone on the ship (which is usually the case). I hope this big red switch is not too incongruous even if I didn't find find a good place to explain my reasoning in full in the fic.

She can’t lose any more time to fretting. Raffi reaches up and flicks the switch. The regenerator powers down, lighting included, and Seven’s eyes flicker open. She stumbles; Raffi grabs her in between her arms before she can fall flat on her face.

If I ever were to commission art for this fic, one of the scenes I'd like to have drawn would be this one; Seven stumbling, half-asleep and in the dark, in Raffi's arms.

“How is she,” she demands, beside the motionless form of her old comrade. The cold hue of the bay’s lighting makes Seven’s eye sockets dark and hollow, and her hands are closed into fists. Emil, on the other side of the biobed, simply obliges her. “Her blood oxygen level is now in the safe range. She had a few cuts and bruises but isn’t in any grave danger.” Raffi notices that the blood and the black eye are gone from Torres’ face. “I was waiting to revive her for a final check for an eventual concussion, even though scans have that at a low probability.” He pauses, squints, and then moves around to get closer to Seven. “You, however—”

Seven is a mess <3 but this mostly goes to show how apprehensive Raffi is in this tense moment, when she still is trying to parse what's going on and worrying about Seven's state.

She mumbles something that Raffi can’t hear, and Seven’s shoulders lose some of the tension they were carrying. “Take it easy. You took a beating,” Seven says, with sudden, unexpected softness. Torres blinks again, turns toward the woman at her side with narrowed eyes. “Seven? Is that you?” “It’s me.” Torres tries a smile, but she shuts her eyes again with a wince. “You look like shit.” “So do you,” Seven retorts, her own amusement tugging at her lips. A whisper to Raffi’s side. “Wait, do they know each other?”

I am still inordinately pleased with myself at this whole exchange lol instead of killing my darlings I pretty much left this piece of dialogue unchanged since one of the first outlines I wrote down for this story. I hope it conveys the sense of a shared history between Seven and B'Elanna, history that may not be entirely confined to the Star Trek: Voyager timeline even if echoes of it are still present, without saying explicitly what it is. Raffi is certainly observing Seven's reactions very closely in order to get a sense of who this person she's only ever seen in the news might be for Seven. And then there's Elnor and Soji, who still have no idea of what's going on at all.

Torres lowers her hands and seems to become aware for the first time that there are other people around her other than Seven and Emil. She takes in her audience with what Raffi assumes is wariness. “Is this your crew, Seven?” “Don’t worry,” Seven replies, “They’re all friends.” Raffi presses her lips together at the noncommittal answer—really, Seven? I get that you’re angry that I didn’t wake you up sooner, but we acted exactly like a crew. Or do you hate the idea of having one so much?

So I don't know how clear it is to readers but again this one-two-three of reaction is pretty much the core of the interpersonal conflict between Raffi, Seven and B'Elanna, and it's essentially all caused by the three of them all having imho similar issues re: trust, fear of abandonment and actually spelling out what it is that they need from each other. I think it makes sense that all three have similar problems because of their traumatic pasts and a present that never really allowed them to sort through any of that (maybe with the exception of B'Elanna, although she still carries a lot of baggage around), not to mention the guilt, especially in Seven's and Raffi's case, for the way they (believe they) have hurt the people they cared about the most.

Essentially Seven has been isolating herself for decades at this point, and B'Elanna is one of the few people she talks to/meets regularly and even that means, like, once a year or less. Said isolation means Seven has never told B'Elanna about La Sirena's crew, and B'Elanna is surprised to find out that Seven has people close to her again and eventually hurt that Seven did not trust her enough to let her know, especially the 'I have a girlfriend now' part (although the reasons for why Seven didn't tell her and why B'Elanna is so hurt are explored later in more detail). Seven is unwilling to admit that these new people are actually a crew because confessing that she now trusts and is close to other people (like she was close to and trusted the Voyager crew long ago) is something she's not ready to do lest something terrible happens to them because of her. Raffi in turn is hurt by Seven's refusal to concede that she, Elnor and Soji represent a crew, because to her it so clearly indicates a lack of trust on Seven's part, exacerbated by the fact that Seven seems to care for her old shipmate so much in comparison.

The rest of the story is, in my intention, all of them pretty much stumbling over all these obstacles until they tentatively find a way past them, in large part thanks to Raffi's analytical approach to everything, and also because what's a better bonding experience than being chased by a warship through an asteroid field and then trying to hijack said warship?

“Wait.” Torres squints at him. “Deactivate? Are you an EMH?” “Emil, at your service,” he replies, quite pleased with himself at the recognition. Torres doesn’t share his enthusiasm. She turns to Seven and says, “An EMH? Are you kidding me?” “It was not my idea,” she replies hastily.

Again, a little exchange I'm very fond of. Difficult patients should stick together, right? I think (or I should say, I hope) Seven and B'Elanna may have given each other some space to air mixed feelings about the Doctor, as hinted by that famous interaction in “Imperfection”. B'Elanna finding Seven in the company of another EMH here makes things worse between them for this reason—there are so many things that Seven hasn't told her, and that seem to contradict everything B'Elanna has come to expect from Seven. Especially not after Seven confessed to her that she's killed Bjayzl, but that's a part of their conflict that is explored more later.

“So, you trust her?” Seven frowns. “Of course.” Raffi tilts her head. “Because she used to be a senior officer on the USS Voyager?” “How many times have you read her Starfleet file already?” Seven retorts, forcefully sticking her left arm in the vacuum suit. “Oh, don’t start. It’s not as if it’s a secret who she is.”

I love mess. I have to imagine this type of fight happened somewhat regularly between Seven and Raffi especially early on in their relationship, with the former bristling at anyone trying to get to know her and the latter the kind of person that simply has to know even to her own detriment, which in turn I think reminds Seven a bit too keenly of her own younger self. If this particular tense conversation doesn't spiral into an outright fight it's because both of them are desperately trying to stay on task as well—the rest of their back and forth lays out the same dynamics I've tried to explain in a point above.

How else Raffi could’ve understood the wildly different emotions that the memory of Admiral Janeway seem to elicit in Seven, if she had not done her own research? (Raffi guesses it’s the mix of deep gratitude and equally deep resentment that Starfleet legends seem to engender in people they take under their wing—not that she would ever admit that to JL.)

Again, a darling I didn't kill... I got a kick out of this parallel and imagining Raffi coming up with it. I DO think that if a Starfleet legend takes you under their wing, you're basically bound to go through the spectrum of emotions about it for the rest of your natural life—and I meant this is a bit cheekily in the case of two legendary captains I have mixed feelings about myself, but they're not the only ones for whom this applies. I have complex feelings about mentorship in general; I found out in my adulthood that I'm unable to fit the role of either mentee or mentor and this has caused me no small amount of grief. I think some of this bled through on my take on Raffi in this fic, in which she's reflecting a few times on her role both as as Picard's second in command on the USS Verity and her way to care for Elnor, remaining ambivalent throughout without any clear resolution.

Ostensibly happy life with her Starfleet family and friends—until the synth ban. Torres then resigns from her post, divorces her husband, gets joint custody of their daughter. Disappears, over the years, in the wide cracks where all non-aligned orgs operating on the Federation borders seem to live these days. Does her daughter hate her for that, Raffi asks herself sourly. She forces the thought out of her mind. That’s pure projection—not a good mental state to ask questions. And Raffi does have a few queries for Torres.

Another piece of the puzzle in the middle-aged women drama! Raffi recognizes that she's projecting quite a bit on B'Elanna from the very start, but even if she does she isn't exactly able to stop herself from doing it (which I think it's extremely relatable—knowing your own patterns doesn't always translate in having developed effective countermeasures, and Raffi has essentially just gotten out a fifteen-years-long depressive slump). I think it's also hard for Raffi to not project because here is another woman whose life has changed completely (and whose marriage collapsed) after the synth ban, except B'Elanna has been doing great, necessary work ever since. It's not the kind of information Raffi can take with any kind of objectivity, imho.

She’s still very pale, burrowing in her suede jacket with her shoulders slumped, but she also seems more at ease, sitting with her weight on her folded right leg. Her knee-high boots must be as well-worn as the smooth elbows of her jacket.

idk guys, my dad used to wear this suede jacket everywhere and now I think it's THEE piece of clothing for mechanically minded, DIY people. And I couldn't leave out the boots, of course.

“I’ve heard about Coppelius,” Torres says, while Raffi walks down the stairs. Ah, the trade-off of leaving Elnor unsupervised with their guest. “I wondered if Seven had something to do with crashing a Borg cube onto the surface of a planet,” Torres continues. “She has a knack for—” “Being in the right place at the right time?” Raffi finishes for her, as she walks over to the table. She smiles, making herself as unassuming and nonthreatening as she can.

I'm also very proud of this scene between Raffi and B'Elanna, in which they're both so obviously taking the measure of each other, alternating between wariness and nonchalance. I also had fun throwing Elnor in the mix because his presence highlights that some of what they're doing is essentially posturing. Rereading it I liked the tension—these aren't the best circumstances in which to meet.

“You said you were attacked? And that your computer core was stolen?” “Yes. I was headed to a rendez-vous near the border, with people I worked with before. Instead of the old shuttles I expected, a warship showed up. Well, I think it was a warship,” Torres amends, “Because to be honest I couldn’t take a good look at it. It seemed to appear in and out of nowhere, and I was too busy trying to avoid its phaser cannons. Those were definitely not from a civilian ship.” She shakes her head. “I couldn’t do much, in any case, it was much faster than I was even at warp. That’s when I tried the subspace eddies, to see if I could slow them down—but then my shields were suddenly toast and my computer core was being beamed out. That’s when I got stranded.”

The bit of the plot I laid out here is something that remained pretty much unchanged from the first outline as well—essentially I had this very vivid image of B'Elanna's shuttle being attacked by a mystery ship, and then I reverse-engineered what lead to that particular outcome.

They’re getting to the heart of the matter, finally. “I’ve been meaning to ask—why would they be interested in stealing your computer?” Torres gives her a lopsided smile. “I am—good at fixing things. Warp cores, defensive systems, repurposing old tech. You name it, I’ve probably tried to bang it back into shape. I worked with all sorts of people, over the years, and over two quadrants” she adds, looking into the half-empty mug. “I have a lot of logs, to keep track of what I did for whom and in order to not get caught into feuds or other sorts of messy situations. It’s—coordinates, lists of equipment, people. Warp signatures. Even access codes, which might have changed after I used them or might’ve not.”

Heartfelt headcanon alert!! I think B'Elanna would find a lot of meaning in turning her life around this way, essentially taking what she loves doing and putting it in the service of mutual aid, even if it's a hard and thankless task. She would also have no illusion about what that entails, and how to survive in situations of conflict, I think.

Raffi is chilled to the bone. “That’s a lot of sensitive data.” Not to mention terrible info-sec all around. “Is the core encrypted at least?” “Look, I know what you’re thinking,” Torres says, glaring, “but I’m not stupid. Reliable and trustworthy offsite data storage is a little hard to come by, in my line of work. So yes, the data is encrypted, and I expect it to hold up against attacks for a little while at least. But it won’t last forever.” Raffi leans back, crossing her arms. She probably would’ve done things differently—had done things differently, during her self-imposed exile from society, getting lost into all sorts of information rabbit holes. She didn’t get rid of all her redundant copies and storage options even after being offered her Starfleet commission back. But Raffi hadn’t exactly been out there, had she? With how the pieces were constantly shifting in the sectors beyond the border, the only loyalty you could be sure of was to yourself. Granted, that’s only if you aren’t prone to self-destructive benders.

I've tried super hard to give Raffi opinions on stuff that concerns her (former) line of work, and this is one of them. She can recognize that B'Elanna didn't have the best info-sec because of her circumstances, but Raffi still thinks it was a terrible idea.

Torres’ eyes flicker to Elnor then back to Raffi. “Huh. I can see Seven has made some interesting friends lately.” Raffi could say the same about Seven’s friends from decades ago, but first she needs to find out what kind of interesting Torres exactly is. [...] Now that's what I call interesting, Raffi thinks, taken aback. The woman in front of her seems to know it too, with the way she’s meeting Raffi’s gaze steadily, as if she’s daring Raffi to have an objection to the absolutely batshit thing she’s just claimed to have done.

I can imagine that even after the return in the Alpha Quadrant, B'Elanna is still fond of crazy solutions for difficult problems, and it might just be the kind of wild feat that makes Raffi pause because I think she likes this kind of daring in people (see what she says to Soji in the show). And so here Raffi is, being wary of this woman and the rapport she and Seven still have, projecting a bit on her, and kind of admiring her. It's a complex, explosive mix of feelings and I think it can easily lead to attraction (as it does later).

“It’s—really nothing important,” she says, closing the holo-interface with an impatient flick of her left hand, “I’m probably just thinking too much. We just extracted her from a near-death situation, and I’m being a hard-ass.” Soji’s smile widens. “You did point a phaser at me the first time we met.”

Raffi blinks, Seven’s sudden apathy making very little sense. She takes in the scene properly; Seven and Torres standing apart, pointedly not meeting each other’s eyes. Elnor hangs out a bit to the side, hands clasped behind his back and a frown on his face. Long faces all around. What the hell happened back there?

I love Soji so much... she WOULD bring that up as a joke. I just had to. I also like the rest of their conversation; I think Soji really trusts Raffi's opinion and I've tried to make that clear there.

Raffi sighs, bringing both hands to her face, on the bridge of her nose. She’s the conspiracy auntie now, isn’t she? God, that’s so sad.

The show is a bit ambivalent, I think, in letting us know what is Raffi's own opinion on her quest to find out what was really behind the Mars attack. While Raffi was eventually proven right I don't think she's proud of how bad she made things for herself while pursuing her goal (even beyond the fact that I'm personally in disagreement with the way the show validates conspiracy theories). I think that after s1, Raffi's assessment of her past actions and fixations is also complicated by the fact that she's trying very hard to move on. The quote above is where I landed—a bit of self-deprecating humor.

I love mess round 2. B'Elanna wants to be out of La Sirena as soon as she can, given everything she's seen that Seven has not told her about, believing she's better off on her own, and Seven obviously doesn't understand why she wants to leave so soon in her state—hence the fight, still a common occurrence between them. But obviously Raffi doesn't know about B'Elanna's motivation at this point.

Raffi walks over to the bed, and sits down on the mattress beside Seven. “Are you worried for her?” “Hard not to be. She says she can manage alone, but she’s without a ship now, and she needs to get her computer core back soon or there will be consequences.” “And the people who stole it and left her for dead have a lot of firepower on their hands,” Raffi adds. Seven turns to her. Quirks her ocular implant in a gesture Raffi quickly learned to love, even if it often leads to heated confrontations. It’s not the case this time. “What are you thinking?” Well, time to explain herself. “Maybe it’s nothing, but I think Torres is not telling us everything about her attack. Her version is—missing context. And if you say you trust her, but she’s shutting you out as well—” Seven twists her mouth. “I don’t like the sound of that.” “I don’t mean that she’s lying to you, it’s just—” “No, I understand.” Seven reaches out to her again, placing her left hand implant on Raffi’s right. It’s cold, just like earlier, but once again the touch is steadying. Seven continues, “I just do not like to consider it.” She takes a big breath, then exhales. “Then again, it wouldn’t be out of character. B’Elanna can be—cagey.” The kettle to the pot, Raffi thinks wearily.

I think I wanted to conclude the chapter in a way that suggested that Seven, despite Raffi's misgivings, does trust her and her judgment a great deal already. I thought a lot about the kind of relationship they would have, even beyond what we've seen on the show, and I think Seven can see very clearly how smart Raffi is and how listening to her helps break Seven out of patterns in her life that would otherwise be inescapable—a thing Seven is also pretty scared of, I think, which is the source of a lot of their problems. The presence of B'Elanna, and the fact that they're already fighting, forces Seven to be a little more vulnerable, which goes a long way to smooth things out between her and Raffi (see also the way she asks Raffi to stay with her while she regenerates).

“Alright. I’ll stay then, and be unconscious with you.” Seven’s laugh, an almost silent affair, is another one of those rare rewards that Raffi will never get tired of witnessing.

I always thought Seven's (very rare) laughter would be almost silent, and tbh I don't care if the Picard show contradicts this. I still like the way this chapter ends a great deal.

[operationslipperypuppet]

all prime numebrs for the fic writer ask! 💛😊

I will pretend you spelled numbers correctly lol. thanks for the ask!!

2. How many fics did you work on this year? (They don’t have to be finished or published!)

I want to say 12. I published 6, I’m currently working on 2 different ideas for the naddpod gift exchange so I’ve started both and will be making a full decision tonight or tomorrow (lmao), and then there are a couple I just decided to not publish and a couple I’m always working on but will never actually commit to finishing because I can’t come up with a satisfying ending.

3. What’s something you learned about yourself as a writer?

That I can allow myself to do the things I want to do and go back and fix the other stuff later. I had previously only done this with a fic that included a bunch of time skips and that was why I wormed around the document but I did this with one fic that I consider my magnum opus and it worked. (I like to write dialogue more than scene descriptors so I wrote all the dialogue back and forth and then went back and added names and descriptors and everything else and it was so much more fun)

5. What fandom(s) did you write for this year?

Naddpod. It was just naddpod. I’m thinking I might break into d20 next year but I make no promises, naddpod is so fun to write for.

7. What character(s) captured your heart?

Hardwon Surefoot. Moonshine Cybin. For some reason I find them easiest to write even though getting Moonshine’s voice right was incredibly daunting every time I wrote her. There’s just so much to play with and it was very fun. Plus the Hardwon being alive reveal rewired my brain.

11. What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing?

how to think about you (without it ripping my heart out). God that was a doozy to write. It was my first foray into doing something multi-chaptered and I did have it finished before I even began publishing it but doing the daily updates and my every chapter mini edits took so much time that it was so much fun to finish. Plus I thought about the idea for truly so long before I started writing it that it was very relieving to finally finish.

13. What fic was the easiest to write?

Fools Rush In (Idiots, However, Take 200 Years). This is the fic I mentioned for number 3. I wrote all the dialogue in basically one pass because it’s a long, drawn out conversation that lasts an entire day. I immensely love writing dialogue and the back and forth, hitting what Hardwon and Moonshine would say and how they’d react was easy. And then, even though I was dreading the descriptors, they came so easily because I could picture them so perfectly. It does feel weird to say that my longest fic to date was the easiest to write but it was.

17. What are your go-to writing snacks?

Doing that classic ADHD thing where you hyperfocus and forget to eat all day and then start shaking and put fistfuls of m&ms in your mouth while waiting for chicken to heat up. But when I remember to snack, Smartfood popcorn.

19. Share your favorite opening line.

“You love me?” (Fools Rush In (Idiots, However, Take 200 Years).) I knew I’d open this with that before I finished the previous work in the series. I enjoy getting straight to the point.

23. Share the final version of a sentence or paragraph you struggled with. What about it was challenging? Are you happy with how it turned out?

This was a hard goddamn choice but here goes:

“Look - “ She paused, took a deep breath, and started again. “Can I make a suggestion? You two know him better than I do, obviously, but this might be a time where you give him some space. I know that’s not really what you three do, but he’s going through one of the worst days of his life. And you are, too, but he’s incredibly in his head about it right now. I think maybe if you give him a moment to work out his own feelings, he’ll be able to articulate them to you. And you will then be able to assure him that you need him. Besides, your MeeMaw will take great care of him, Moonshine.” (The Void of an Absence)

Alanis is speaking here. And I wanted her to be pragmatic without seeming insensitive while also staying relatively true to the character she is in the show. I ended up with this slightly more emotionally aware Alanis than we’ve seen but she does switch straight to business afterwards, and that is kind of how Murph RP’d the scene with her and Hardwon. But I overthought it a lot. I’m pretty okay with its final version, but mostly because I got to sneak a “tell me your feelings and I’ll tell you that I need you” reference in there.

29. If this were an awards show, who would you thank?

Obviously the two crew for creating characters that so thoroughly destroy and entertain me, and the people who got excited when I said shit like “I have a terrible idea that’s going to hurt” and responded with “do it.”

Fic writer asks list - ask

[according2thelore]

Love potion no. 9

1, 3, 4, 9(haha), and 11

Literally the 1st fic that introduced me to yall and probably my favorite!(though you have so many good ones, especially when combined with the art🤌🤌)

hi!! :) EEP thank you so much, i'm so glad you like it! i agree--charlotte's art immediately elevates anything it's accompanying into an S-tier item

here's the link to love potion no. 9 on ao3! (quick recap: it's the love potion one, lol)

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

i LOVE love potion fics, especially subversive love potion fics where they don't work how they're supposed to, or work in opposite ways. love potion fic (not sex pollen fics (which are also v fun but mostly don't deal w the icky gross guilty emotions of being in love w someone)) are pretty rare generally, but oooooh i eat them up when i find them.

in this case, i chose dean because a sam who found out he was bewitched would probably avoid dean as much as possible as to not make dean uncomfortable, and i think sam would have the most guilt about taking away/infringing upon someone else's autonomy/true wants. and i loveeee writing angsting winchester narration. it's delicious 2 me.

i also wanted it to feel kinda rom-commy? third act conflict, miscommunication, and all.

3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

It’s exactly what he had thought it would be, when he still let himself think about it. He had shared this man’s toothbrush, had shared his bed, had shared his clothes. This isn’t anything foreign, this is Dean. It's the rush of the Impala’s wheels underneath him, the adrenaline of a fight, the spark of Roman candles, the salt of sweat and tang of blood and the depthless, endless night.

this one, i think! i think i have some really solid lines in this fic, but this one makes my chest fuzzy. or this one (also solid!):

Dean’s eyes are soft, and his mouth is pulled into a hesitant smile. He looks exhausted, suddenly. He looks…In his pajamas and bare feet and toast crumbs on his shirt, Sam doesn’t think he’s ever loved anything more. Sam’s throat closes. This is so unfair. This is so fucked.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

“Well, you went on that huge rant about those kudzu-eating goats last month and invasive species blah blah blah. So wildflowers. Y’know.” Dean trails off, and looks at Sam over his shoulder as he wads the empty paper bag into a ball. “They’re wild.”

i don't know! i think this one is fun bc it kinda captures the dean i'm going for in this fic: very purposefully blasé. he cares but he can't let you know, until it all bubbles over. he listens to sam's dorky rants, but cannot tell him that outright lol--what if sam finds out he cares?? no shot.

bonus: i don't know which one to count this as (dialogue or narration), but i like this line because dean's trying to do the math on the acceptable brother-to-woman ratio for sam to have sex with him, which i thought was pretty funny

Dean had been coming around by then, muttering “S’mmy? ‘f there’re two of ‘em…would you do it then? ‘ow many—how many do I have to get?” as Sam hauled him to his feet.

9 (lol): Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

originally (to the surprise of no one, lol) this fic was longer! i had a couple of scenes included in the "montage" in the middle, about an early kiss (in which dean decides to go for it and sam thinks he just assaulted his brother), and a couple other i forget now! i am terrible about wanting to do every single idea a have for a fic, even when they don't fit as well.

i also was originally going to have the potion work the entire time, but it plays out the exact same. dean doesn't feel any more in love w sam than he already is, bc he is already in love with him, and thinks the potion didn't work. he does all the shenanigans anyway, bc like hey why the fuck not? but then it became tricky when it came to how sam finds out that this is genuine emotion from dean and not the potion actually working.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

i think it's fun! besides the end, it's mostly ridiculous and fluffy, and i think i got sam's brain pretty okay! which is not my usual forté. i like the balance it strikes between being fluffy (the flowers, the bar, etc.) and agonizing (sam's running narration abt this being real). i was genuinely shocked that this is one of my more popular fics, but i'm so glad it is! it makes me happy! :)

(send me one of my fics and i'll answer some questions!)

[ryanmeft]

Movie Review: The Marvels

This is Ms. Marvel’s house, and everyone else is just a tenant. The latest MCU outing is the lowest point of the franchise to date, with a muddled and poorly-explained plot, two wooden leads, an underutilized villain, and entirely too much MCU advertising. At a brisk 105 minutes, it is somehow both overstuffed and rushed. So how, then, can I say you should see it? Two words: Kamala Khan.

It is thirty years after the original Captain Marvel. Carol Danvers (Brie Larson) lives on a spaceship and seems to hold down a job as a galactic peacekeeper-ambassador, though how this keeps food on the table is unclear. Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson), also residing in space but on a massive station, sends Monica Rambeau (Teyonah Parris) out on missions to investigate…something. This something, which looks kind of like the way movies always portray event horizons, is a strange disturbance in space that can A: cause wormholes, B: be used as a source of power for the villain and C: make it so that the movie’s three heroines swap places whenever they use their powers. It’s a cosmic maguffin working overtime.

This plot is, to be kind, a mess. The Space Something causes Danvers and Rambeau to swap places with each other and Kamala Khan (Iman Vellani), lead hero in the Disney+ show Ms. Marvel. As the characters swap powers, they shift between Kamala’s home, Danvers’ spaceship, Fury’s space-station and various other planets, including an intriguing one where everyone speaks in song. None of these feel like any more than pit-stops for the plot, and we constantly wish the film would pick one or two and focus on those. So, too, does Zawe Ashton’s villain get slighted. Superhero movies usually deal in uncomplicated maniacs, and Ashton’s Dar-Benn bucks that trend, with a legitimate reason to be pissed off at the hero. This reason is done away with in a flashback and never explored as a deeper part of the character. Like Thor: Love & Thunder, the movie could have benefited from slowing down and taking more time to establish its villain as a person.

Let’s leave aside the plot for a moment, though, and discuss the young woman named Kamala. For those who watched the show Ms. Marvel, no introduction is necessary. For those who didn’t, she’s a teenager in Jersey City who inherits light-bending properties from a time-traveling gauntlet inherited from her grandmother. Her powers are less important than her personality, for she ends up being the glue that barely holds a confused and dull film together. Played by newcomer Iman Vellani, she has that Spider-Man energy, bringing an enthusiasm and seemingly effortless charm to every scene she steals.

She also happens to be a massive fan of Danvers, yet Vellani knows how to hold back and let her enthusiasm build rather than just running up and spouting a one-liner. Her expressions, body language and every line of dialogue are perfect for the character, which is good, because the film desperately needs her. Larson and Parris never manage to generate any individual sympathy from the audience, and spend all their non-Kamala time dryly reciting details of the impossible-to-follow plot or making bland promises of heroism. At one point, when CM must reduce herself to tears over having accidentally done a very bad thing, it’s obvious Larson is forcing the waterworks, and when Parris must confront a vision of her deceased mother (Lashana Lynch), her reactions are right out of summer stock.

Vellani’s only credits so far are all playing Ms. Marvel, but if the universe loves us, she will be a star long after the MCU has finally crumbled to dust. She and Jackson are the only ones on screen who seem even dimly aware of how silly this all is, and they treat it all like a game. You can’t say the movie doesn’t have some clue what the audience wants, because in the best non-Kamala moment it multiplies the previous film’s mutant alien cat into dozens. I won’t tell you why the film needs these cats, but does it matter? An alien mutant kitten is its own reward. To get that reward, you need to have watched several TV shows and movies (I won’t say which ones, to avoid spoilers), and the film often feels like homework that most people forgot to do.

Once we’re done with the nonsense plot, the rolled-over-and-died dialogue, the emotionally hollow acting and constant pushy references to the larger MCU, we know only one thing: Ms. Marvel needs her own movie. She’s already left this one in the dust.

Verdict: Average

Note: I don’t use star ratings. Here are my possible verdicts:

Must-See

Highly Recommended

Recommended

Average

Not Recommended

Avoid Like the Plague

[primnroses]

what are your thoughts after sasuke retsuden anime? did you enjoy it?

I enjoyed it. I had low expectations because seeing it was only gonna be 5 episodes and knowing it's SP adapting it I knew it wasn't gonna be perfect. Rushed and left with much to be desired in terms of content from the novel.

First of all, they cut out Sakura's sensing technique, her Fire Release (manga did too) and her barrier-type ninjutsu was so randomly animated that I had trouble discovering where it was coming from and who had done it. I will compile all of the jutsu that Sakura used in Sasuke Retsuden when the manga ends but you can see it here too. That was the worst thing they did in my opinion.

They prioritized sasusaku moments more than others in terms of animation and art quality, some of which included some original dialogue like the ring scene; but they also cut other sasusaku moments like "this doctor is my wife" and Sasuke caressing Sakura's face at the lake, among others, while others without sasusaku had really bad animation and art like Sasuke freeing Menou from the Edo-tensei.

Congratulations to the freelance animators, but this ain't it. Inconsistent animation and weird art style made some scenes look very goofy. They don't have enough money or what?

They revealed that Jiji was a bad guy as early as episode 3, which killed one of the best moments of the manga in my opinion. If they had animated Jiji stabbing Sakura just like the novel, it would have been the perfect plot twist.

The last episode had some major fighting scenes that were cut out and done terribly.

Lastly, the timeline. If they wanted to follow the novel suit, it should have been animated before the Kawaki arc and with the three novels included or animate it right after Kurama was killed and make it a disease product of Naruto not being a jinchūriki anymore. Being made a flashback of many years back but adding scenes of Sarada was wrong.

I appreciate the adaptation, I have great screenshots and people loved the ring scene and the lake scene. The great majority of the fandom didn't want the adaptation because we know what kind of studio SP is, so there was disappointment in some aspects I mentioned before.

Other than that, Sakura and Sasuke demonstrated to be the most powerful couple in the battlefield, not only in strength but they were also in sync. Sakura's intelligence at solving the mysteries and Sasuke's talent to find clues all around him was unmatched, they complement each other perfectly. They also show that despite the distance, they love and care for each other deeply and it was nice to see it animated for everyone to see.